


mortal bodies, timeless souls

by beyzaljackson



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff, I swear, Inspired by Call Me By Your Name, Light Angst, M/M, Strangers to Lovers, but happier, mostly fluff tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-21
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2020-05-14 23:10:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 33,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19283116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beyzaljackson/pseuds/beyzaljackson
Summary: 'boundless by the time I cried, I built your walls around me.'kyungsoo wants to spend his summer with his friends but his mother has other ideas. like inviting their friends over for the whole summer. good thing their kid seems fine, or, does he?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've wanted to write this for so long! hope y'all enjoy it!
> 
> ps. I didn't quiet enjoy the age difference in cmbyn so here jongin is 19 while kyungsoo is 17.

 

summer '84

 

“No buts! For once, do what I ask you to do.” His mother sounded annoyed as she leaned down on the kitchen counter with a deep sigh.

“You never ask me anything. It’s like I’m not even a member of this family!” Kyungsoo talked a tad louder than he should, rubbing his temples.

“Stop exaggerating. It’s just friends. Why are you so against it? My friends stayed here before.” His mother inhaled deeply again, she seemed like she was running out of patience.

“Yeah but they all left early. You said these ones will stay for two months.” 

“And what’s so bad about it?”

“You’re asking me to share my room with a _stranger_ for two months, mom.”

“Both your dad and I know the Kims for a long time. I’m sure their kid is just as sweet as them.” She spoke calmer then before.

“Still,” Kyungsoo insisted, “I don’t want a stranger in my personal space.” He huffed, crossing his arms. “You have friends here. Why bother inviting others?” It’s not like they don't know anyone here. They’ve been living in this foreign country for so long. Why need others?

“I miss them.” His mother's tone came out lower this time, enough to make Kyungsoo feel guilty all of a sudden.

“You can see them when we go back to Korea, in winter.” Kyungsoo avoided looking at his mother, playing with the hem of his t-shirt.

“So that’s it? My son wouldn’t want me to be happy just because he doesn’t want to befriend someone?” _Oh you gotta be kidding!_ “I guess I should call them and cancel it.” Kyungsoo couldn't believe that she played that card and _actually_ made him feel guilty.

“Oh my god!” Kyungsoo screamed like a little child who couldn't get what he wanted from the toy store. “Fine.” He tried to exit the kitchen but his mom was faster. She caught her son, embracing him tightly, planting a small kiss on his hair.

“Thank you. You’ll have fun, I swear.” She said, releasing him after one last squeeze.

“Yeah, yeah.” She let him go with a loud chuckle. Kyungsoo headed to his room, feeling unstrung. He should make some space for the Kim kid.

“Oh, you big softie.” He turned his head towards the house’s entrance. Baekhyun stared at him, a playful smirk on his lips. “Mommy’s boy.”

“Shut up.”

“I’m serious, that was cute.” Baekhyun ruffled his hair as they started climbing the stairs together. Kyungsoo wouldn't let anyone else touch him this freely but his childhood friend has a pass no matter how annoying he is.

“Please help me.” Kyungsoo beckoned Baekhyun to his room. “They’ll be here in two days. I need to move some stuff and make room for their kid.”

“You keep calling him kid, don’t you know his name?” Baekhyun moved towards Kyungsoo’s desk. “Because I’m sure your mom told you about them.” He raised an eyebrow, grabbing the books Kyungsoo left laying on his desk last night.

“Yeah, but, you know.” Kyungsoo stammered before making sure that his mother was still downstairs. “I don’t care.”

“Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun called his name in a judging tone.

“I’ll ask her.” Kyungsoo said, heaving a sigh. “Is it just you and me this summer?”

“Chanyeol and Sooyoung are coming next week. Joohyun might join them too.” Baekhyun answered, taking out some clothes from Kyungsoo’s wardrobe after placing the books on a shelf. “Jihyo is already here, not that you care.” He kept talking in a indignant tone.

“Why wouldn’t I care? She’s our friend too.” Kyungsoo deadpanned at the annoyed boy.

“Yeah, she’s _our_ friend. She doesn’t want to be friends with _you,_ you know that.” Baekhyun strangely avoided looking at Kyungsoo.

“I can’t force myself to like her, Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo laid down on his bed facedown, deciding not to question Baekhyun's sudden coldness.

“I’m not telling you to like her. Just don’t act like a dick.”

“What if she gets the wrong idea?”

“She won’t. She’s not an idiot.” He kept talking, pushing Kyungsoo from the bed. “Unlike you.” He added with a playful voice.

* * *

“At least the house is big. Maybe you won’t even see them.” Baekhyun was watching outside, leaning on the window frame. "And you'll be with us the whole time. It'll be fine."

“As if.” Kyungsoo scoffed, rolling on his bed to stand up. “You know my mother’s gonna make me spend time with them and their kid.” He walked into the bathroom to wash his face. Cold water always helped him freshen up.  

"Didn’t she say that he’s your age?” He heard Baekhyun shout from inside.

“Yeah but it doesn’t matter.” Kyungsoo dried his face and walked out of the small room, tossing the towel into the laundry basket. “I don’t like meeting people.”

“You don’t like _people._ ” Baekhyun faced him, a wide grin spreaded on his face. Kyungsoo mirrored his friend, feeling a little better. It was true, Kyungsoo has always felt better with a small group of friends. If it was up to him, he'd spent the entire summer with Baekhyun. _Only Baekhyun._

Baekhyun twisted his body, bending over the frame as they heard a car engine.

“I guess it’s them.” Kyungsoo squeezed himself next to Baekhyun to see their guests.

You see, this was supposed to be a fun summer. Kyungsoo was supposed to spend time with his friends and forget about all the fatigue the school caused him during winter.

But apparently, his mother had a different plan in mind. She disregarded any complaints from Kyungsoo while she invited their friends over for summer. Yes, the _entire_ _fucking summer._ Kyungsoo's now supposed to live with strangers and take care of their kid. Life’s a fucking joke and his mom seems to enjoy it.

He climbed down the stairs, sighing deeply as Baekhyun followed him, one hand on Kyungsoo's shoulder, squeezing it tightly. _I'm here,_ Baekhyun said with just one gesture and Kyungsoo was greatful. His moodiness was not just about a few strangers. Kyungsoo might seem lively around his friends but he's known them for years. He felt anxiety filling his veins around new people.

He could already hear his mother screaming at her friends, greeting them with a loud, enthousiactic voice.  _It's fine. You're doing this for your mother._

Still, he groaned silently standing at the bottom of the stairs and turned to Baekhyun who only smiled a little and pushed Kyungsoo out of the house.

He stood in front of the door frame, squinting to see the strangers. The sun must hate him too. It shone even brighter today.

He hoped to avoid the whole greeting process and just wanted to go back to his room, lock the door so that he wouldn’t have to meet these people. He could hear his heart pound fast inside his chest.

The petite lady whom his mother was just hugging tightly realized him standing there.

“Oh my god, is that Kyungsoo?” Her voice came out sweet but still,  just as loud. Oh boy, she's going to be one of those people who keeps pinching his cheeks and calling him cute.

Kyungsoo tried to smile as he started approaching the lady.

Aaand there. He was captured in some woman’s arms that he had no idea about who she was and he couldn’t breathe. Also he was sure that she broke some ribs. He already hated this summer. He was sure Baekhyun was having the time of his life back there, staring at them from the entrance.

She must have realized Kyungsoo’s immotility, she released him with a soft chuckle. “Dear, I’m sorry. It’s just I haven’t seen you in so long!”

Did she ever see him? Why doesn’t Kyungsoo remember? Kyungsoo didn't recall any memories of her. His mom didn’t tell him about this. 

“That doesn’t give you the right to suffocate him.” A man who can’t be older than Kyungsoo’s father deadpanned next to the slender woman. Kyungsoo stiffled a snort as he mentally thanked the man.

“It’s fine! Kyungsoo loves hugs.” Kyungsoo glanced at his mother, trying to hide his utter shock. She wore a playful smirk as if she was daring Kyungsoo to protest.

Well, Kyungsoo hated hugs or any kind of human contact, but he’s more scared of his mother. He slowly turned to the strange couple and hoped that they didn’t realize that his smile is a fake one.

“Well then, he’ll get along with Jongin.” Mrs. Kim chuckled slowly once again. Did this woman ever stop laughing since she walked out of the car?

Also who was Jongin? The old man? Why did this lady think that he’ll get along with her husband? Oh boy, is it one of _those_ weird couple who like to-

“I’m Jongin.” A soft voice interrupted Kyungsoo’s horrified thoughts.

Kyungsoo moved forward and spotted a tall boy standing next to his father.

“Hi.” His tone was low, lower than his mother at least. He sent a bashful smile and not knowing what to do, Kyungsoo just nodded. _Idiot._ He literally faltered because he saw a _pretty boy_. This day didn't start right.

“Okay let’s go inside!” Kyungsoo’s mom exclaimed excitedly and Kyungsoo was more than happy to comply. “Kyungsoo, honey, help Jongin with the suitcases.” He heard his mom speak in a flat tone.

He caught Baekhyun’s not so silent chuckle, apparently his mom did too. “How about you give a hand too, Baekhyun?” His mom glanced at the short boy leaning on the door frame. Kyungsoo smirked at his direction. _We suffer together, friend._

“It’s fine, you can just show me where to put them.” Jongin said but Kyungsoo already grabbed two suitcases.

“Follow me.” He ordered the taller one, his eyes were fixed ahead.

Climbing up the stairs in silence, they carried all the suitcases to upstairs. They were heavier than Kyungsoo expected. _Right._ The Kims were spending the whole summer here.

“Which ones belong to your parents?” Kyungsoo asked the tanned boy in a cold tone. “You can carry them there.” He pointed at the empty room across his.

The other one noded quickly and carries three suitcases at the same time.

Well, Kyungsoo might be an annoyed ass but he’s no liar. That boy was _attractive._ He had a tanned skin unlike Kyungsoo who's always been very pale. He was taller than Kyungsoo, soft brown hair fell on his forehead, shadowing his pretty, small eyes. And-

A small cough took him away from his thoughts. He glanced at Baekhyun, his lips are parted in a grin.

“I thought you weren’t happy with the idea of-”

“Shut up.”

“You’re the one who’s looking after that kid like he’s some kind of god!” Baekhyun swung his arms as he objects.

“I said shut up.”

Jongin walked towards them as Kyungsoo landed a punch on Baekhyun’s arm. The silence filled the hallway and Kyungsoo felt disgruntled. Jongin grabbed the remaining two cases and looked at Kyungsoo expectantly. Right. He was supposed to show him his room. Kyungsoo’s room. He scrunched his face at the idea. He _hated_ strangers.

He gestured at the open door with a bad grace.

“Okay, you’re going to sleep there.” Kyungsoo pointed at his bed. _Yeah._ The guest kid also got Kyungsoo's bed while he has to sleep on the ground. “You can put your stuff here.” He opened his closet and showed the space Baekhyun emptied earlier.

The tall one smiled and nodded again. He acted like a robot, not even showing any emotions, but he just arrived so Kyungsoo thought it was only normal.

“I’m Baekhyun by the way.” Baekhyun stretched his hand to Jongin. “Kyungsoo loves me the most so don’t think you can steal him from me.” Jongin halted at the handshake, glancing at Baekhyun and then to Kyungsoo.

“I don’t-”

“He’s just messing around.” Kyungsoo shooted a glare to Baekhyun’s direction and grabbed his other hand. “You can use the shower if you want.” He added walking out of the room, dragging Baekhyun with him, without sparing a glance to the bewildered boy.

* * *

Angry. Yes. Kyungsoo definitely felt _angry._ Did he really have to share his room with this kid?

He asked his mom if he could sleep in the living room but she said no almost instantly. _That’s rude,_ she said knitting her eyebrows, _he’ll think you left because you didn’t want to stay with him._

 _But I don’t want to stay with him,_ Kyungsoo answered back, earning a glare from his mother.

He recalled the unpleasant dinner, lying on the floor, moving in exasperation to find a comfortable position.

 _I can sleep on the floor,_ the kid said, _it’s fine._

 _No way,_ said Kyungsoo’s mom, _you’re the guest._

And then she pinched Kyungsoo’s arm. _If you say anything, you won’t see your friends for the rest of the summer_ kind of pinch.

Kyungsoo glared at the boy who seemed apologetical. He knew it was not his fault but still, he couldn’t help his pettiness. If he was actually being nice, he could’ve asked Kyungsoo to sleep in his own bed when his mom left. But no, the kid- _Jongin,_ seemed totaly fine as the stretched in his sleep. In Kyungsoo’s bed. His comfortable, soft bed.

 _That’s a shame,_ he thought switching his position for the hundredth time,  _I could've liked him._

* * *

“I’m sorry. I can talk to your mom again if you want!” Jongin hovered above him, splattering apologies while Kyungsoo sat on the floor, massaging his stiff neck.

Looking up to Jongin, Kyungsoo could see the actual concern on his brown orbs. He somehow wanted to believe in the sincerity of this person that he barely knows.

There was something very appeling about Jongin’s face. One could’t help but feel affected. As Kyungsoo did.

“It’s fine. I sleep weird anyway. My entire body gets stiffened.” _A lie._ Kyungsoo's always slept just fine. When he was in his bed.

He internally cursed himself. This was the first actual conversation they have since Jongin arrived and Kyungsoo was talking about his body. Baekhyun would laugh so hard.

They stared at each other for a while, in silence. Jongin seemed even cuter now with his bed hair sticking from everywhere, his already plump lips were swollen and his eyes were a little red. A sight to see.

Kyungsoo coughed a little to break the uncomfortable silence.

“Is it okay if I take a shower first? The water helps.” This one? _Not a lie._ He could use a shower. He was all stiffened up and he needed a refresher. 

“Sure.” Jongin mumbled quietly and sat cross-legged on the bed, pursing his lips into a lopsided smile. Despite his size, he seemed like a small child.

Kyungsoo lifted off from the ground to get some clean underwear, a t-shirt and shorts. He entered the bathroom without looking at Jongin’s direction and locked the door.A little privacy felt nice.

Taking a deep breath, he stripped himself off of his clothes and placed himself under the hot water. He usually preferred ice-cold water during summer but he didn't think it'll help him soften now.

He could hear the noises coming from the garden as the water ran fast down on him. He could hear the laughs of his mom and Minhee, the house maid. They were probably preparing breakfast.

Hearing his mom, he remembered that he needed to get out of the shower quick if he didn’t want to meet with her vexed looks _. You used the bathroom before the guest?_ He could hear his mother’s judging tone, _where were your manners?_

He stopped the water and dried himself quickly before putting on his clothes. He left the bathroom, the droplets of water falling from his hair wetting his t-shirt.

Jongin wass no longer sitting on the bed like Kyungsoo left him. He was standing now, uh, naked. Well, not _entierly_ _naked,_ but he wasn’t wearing a top.

They stared at each other for a few seconds before Kyungsoo turned his gaze towards the door. _Did he really just gawk at the latter’s body?_  

“Sorry, I should’ve, um, I should’ve called out before getting out.” He mumbled timidly, avoiding Jongin’s face, well, _body._ God, the whole thing was so awkward and besetting.

It’s not like he’s never seen a male body before but yet again, they didn't know each other and Kyungsoo didn’t want to make the other one uncomfortable.

Maybe Kyungsoo _should_ try to get to know him. Not because of his muscles of course. Well, maybe a little.

“I’ll tidy up, you go in.” Kyungsoo spoke, coughing to fix his cracking voice.

“It’s fine, I already did.” The other one said with a soft chuckle. Kyungsoo turned to Jongin who was wearing a joyful smile, knitting his eyebrows together.

Then his eyes wandered around the room. His bed -Jongin’s bed, for now-, the mess he slept in on the floor, even the books he left scattered around the other night. They were all cleaned up, placed where they were supposed to be. _Oh._

“You didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to.” The taller one smiled sheepishly. Probably proud of his actions.

“No.” Kyungsoo’s tone came out colder than he intends. “You don’t get it. We might spend most of our time in Europe, but my mom is attached to traditions. The guest don’t do work.” He breathed in deeply. “Fuck, she’s never going to stop talking about this.” He tousled his damp hair. “She’s going to make my whole summer unbearable.”

“We won’t tell-”

“That's great, thanks.” Kyungsoo scoffed at the confused looking boy as he walked out the door. He climbed down the stairs, stomping his on the wooden surface.

What a great way to start your day.

* * *

“You exaggerated.” Kyungsoo ran into Baekhyun in the kitchen when he entered the wide room. The latter was cutting his mom's homemade bread. Mrs. Byun never forgets to send whatever she cooked to Kyungsoo's family.

The other boy usually spends his entire summer at Kyungsoo’s house, most of the time, he’d stay over. But this summer wasn’t one of them since Kyungsoo already had company.

“Like you don’t know my mom.” Kyungsoo inhaled deeply, looking out from the kitchen window, watching ducks run around in the garden.

“But he said that he wouldn’t tell, didn’t he?” Baekhyun raised both his eyebrows. “I get it, Soo. You don’t like being around a stranger, but you’re also a stranger to him.” He placed the bread he sliced into the basket. “I don’t think he feels any different than you do. There’s only one person he could probably get along with but he’s acting like a complete dick and it’s the first day.”

“Fine. I get it. Stop dragging me.” Kyungsoo rolled his eyes at his friend. He still didn’t think he was too harsh. You can’t just do whatever you want in a house you don’t know the rules of.

“You deserve it.” Baekhyun cleaned the bread crumbs on the counter. “Whatever, you’ll just apologize.”

“Apologize? For what exactly?” Kyungsoo asked in a high pitched voice.

“I literally just lectured you about it.” Baekhyun seemed like he’s enjoying the whole thing. Of course he did. He loved torturing Kyungsoo for starters.

“You fucking-”

“The breakfast is ready!” Kyungsoo heard his mom yell from the garden, wincing at the thought of seeing Jongin again..

“Whatever. Are you staying?”

“No. I have to help mom.” Baekhyun handed out the breadbasket to Kyungsoo. He groaned a little as they walked out from the kitchen door. “We’re going to clean the house.” Kyungsoo giggled loudly, earning himself a punch on the arm. He wished instead of Jongin, he could just stay with Baekhyun. His best friend never failed to put a smile on his face.

He walked towards the table after sending off Baekhyun to his own torture. Everyone was seated around the wide table, waiting for him.

“So you _are_ able to find your way around the house.” His mom didn’t seem angry or annoyed, it was obvious that she was just being playful.

Kyungsoo slightly bowed to the Kims, mumbling an apology. He seated himself next to his mother.

The old friends immediately started bantering about god knows what while Kyungsoo busied himself with his pancake. He didn’t even glance at Jongin, neither did he think that the latter would like that after the drama he caused this morning.

Kyungsoo leaned back on his chair, feeling the light breeze on his skin. He closed his eyes for a second. This summer house gave him peace. It was silent, away from the town. His friends' houses were close so he didn't mind.

There were a few other Korean families who preferred spending their summers in Italy.

The Parks arrived after Kyungsoo’s family, he still remembered how loud he cried when Chanyeol pushed him into the lake when they were kids. Sooyoung, Chanyeol’s little sister, being the ever sweetheart she was, rescued Kyungsoo from her brother’s bullying.

The Byuns, Baekhyun’s family arrived after them. The moment they met, Kyungsoo knew Baekhyun would be his long time friend. Baekhyun was Kyungsoo’s total opposite. A social butterfly who was very, _very_ loud. Kyungsoo loved him.

And then there was another Park family. He didn’t know the entire family, just the daughter, Jihyo. They met through Joohyun, another good friend of Kyungsoo.

They were all like this big one family even though Kyungsoo didn’t like the idea since he didn’t like the crowd, but it was fine. It was only for the summer anyway. In winter, everyone went back to their busy lives.

Kyungsoo leaned lower on his chair as the banter went on. He could hear the trees rustling with the slight wind that caressed his skin.

He slowly cracked his eyes open once he realized the silence that fell on the table. Everyone's eyes were on him, smiles spreaded on their lips. He felt his cheeks grow warmer. His eyes lowered down to his hands as he sat up straight.

“You should go around.” His father broke the silence. He seemed like he was talking to Jongin since his eyes were on the tanned boy. But Jongin’s eyes were fixed on Kyungsoo. _Great._

The other boy blinked rapidly like he just got out of a state of trance when he noticed Kyungsoo watching him. His brown orbs grew a little before he turned to listen to the man speaking.

Kyungsoo’s father kept talking but Kyungsoo was’t listening. His eyes lingered on Jongin more than necessary. His chocolate brown hair looked damp. He was wearing a white tank top, revealing his biceps. His face was still plush from the sleep.

A sudden wave of guilt hit Kyungsoo and he thought that he really needed to apologize. He shouldn't have snapped at Jongin like that, he was being childish.

“Kyungsoo can give you a tour, right?” All eyes were on him again, taking him away from his train of thought. He glanced away from Jongin, feeling a slight disappointment.

“Huh?” His gaze turned towards his father, not quiet catching his words.

“You’ll help Jongin go around and learn the place, right?”

“No, it’s okay, I can find a map-”

“Okay.” Kyungsoo stammered out, a little louder than he intended. But he didn’t care, this was his chance. “We can leave after breakfast, if you’re not too tired from the trip.” He asked Jongin instantly.

Jongin gave him a calculating look, he’s not wrong to do so. The person who was being a literal dick a few minutes ago wanted to help you? Kyungsoo would feel suspicious too.

Kyungsoo tilted his head a little, sending Jongin a dainty look. It always worked on his mother whenever he asked for something.

“Yeah, sure.” Jongin smiled a little, Kyungsoo was sure that the latter was faking it.

* * *

“Here.” Kyungsoo handed out the duster to Jongin. “It hasn’t been used for a while, sorry.” The latter sent a little smile to Kyungsoo and stayed silent as he wipeed the dust of Kyungsoo’s old bicycle.

“Um-”

“You can toss it there.” Kyungsoo pointed at the table full of his father’s junk inside the garage. “You ready?” He asked Jongin, gesturing towards the door as Jongin kept his eyes on the bicycle. This seemed like it was going to be hard, apologizing to the other one. Jongin sulked like a little child even though he looked fine when they got up from the table.

They cycled out of the garden to the paved road. Kyungsoo felt weird, they didn’t talk as he usually did with baekhyun when they rode bicycles together. Maybe he shouldn’t have pushed, he felt like he made the other one uncomfortable. Baekhyun was right, Kyungsoo was a stranger to Jongin as well. He should’ve been nicer.

“So, what do you want to do?” He inquired to break the silence, his eyes remaining on the road ahead. He recalled that one time he fell down here. It hurt like hell, the scratches on his knees.

“You can just show me where the museums and the bookstores are.” Jongin said after a few seconds. “I learn quick. You won’t have to get dragged around with me.” His voice came out a tad lower with the last sentence.

“I’m not coming because I was dragged.” Kyungsoo tried really hard not to sound annoyed.  _I'm trying to be nice here._  “We’ll start with the bookstores.” He fastened his speed on the empty road, Jongin followed him as Kyungsoo hoped he would.

* * *

“This place is great!” Kyungsoo watched from aside as Jongin enthused over Daehyun’s bookstore. “It’s like from old movies!” The taller exclaimed looking through the dusty shelves.

Kyungsoo felt some kind of proud filling him. This was his favorite place in this town, well at least one of them. He always came here to buy books or to have a little chat with the owner.

“That’s Daehyun.” He talked a little loud to catch the other’s attention. “He owns this place. He helped my family a lot when they first arrived here.” He explained with a smile lingering on his lips.

“I didn’t think there would be many Koreans here.” Jongin stated, raising his eyebrows. “I thought I’d have to hang out with bunch of Italians, barely being able to speak.”

Kyungsoo laughed at that. “That how I was growing up. Except for Baekhyun, he was always with me.” With that, something changed on Jongin’s expression. He glanced away from Kyungsoo. “Most of them bought a house for summer after spending time in my parent’s house. They like the atmospher of the town.” Kyungsoo mocked.

“Well they aren’t wrong.” Jongin talked slowly. “I thought it would be crowded and loud but it’s calm. I like that.”

“Maybe your parents would buy an house here too.” Kyungsoo spoke without thinking. Jongin seemed like something between bemused and amused. _There you go,_  Kyungsoo thought to himself. _You freaked him out._

“You’re already getting used to me, huh?” Jongin glanced back at him once again, a small grin forming on his lips.

“I was basically raised by him.” Kyungsoo kept talking to avoid the unnecessary tension and of course, to change the subject. “My parents were always working when I was little so he took care of me. Taught me how to read.”

He smiled fondly at the memories of Daehyun letting him take all those books for free. The old man helped him a lot with his loneliness.

He gazed at Jongin again, lips pressed together into a shy smile. The latter was watching him with some kind of fondness in his eyes.

“Sorry.” He whispered after staring at the taller for a few seconds. “I talk a lot sometimes.” A total lie. He didn’t even like talking. Particularly with people he didn’t know.

“It’s okay.” Jongin said. His grin turned into an endearing smile. “You can tell me more. I’m a good listener.” He shrugged walking towards Kyungsoo.

“I’m sorry about this morning too.” Kyungsoo coughed a little. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” He kept speaking, making Jongin stop in his tracks, his eyebrows raising slightly.

“It’s fine, really. I understand, it’s annoying to have someone come and disturb you.” Jongin replied looking Kyungsoo right in the eyes. There was something strong about Jongin's gaze. Kyungsoo felt something shift in him as those small, brown eyes looked at him in such kindship.

“You don’t disturb me.” Kyungsoo was as bewildered as Jongin at his answer. He was disturbed.

“Like I said, it’s fine.” Jongin smiled wider, showing his tiny teeth. _Cute._  “Can we stay here a little longer? I want to buy some books.”

“Yeah, sure.” He was glad Jongin that changed the subject. “I’ll call Daehyun inside, he’ll help you.” He lifted himself off from the table he's been sitting.

“You must know this place well?” Kyungsoo halted at Jongin’s words. “You said you were raised here?” He nodded slowly for an answer. “Then you help me.”

“Daehyun knows better. He’s been doing this for-”

“You can just say no if you don’t want want to.” Jongin’s face fell a little but he didn’t sound angry. “I won’t resent.”

“I just thought he’d be more helpful.” Kyungsoo’s voice came out lower than he expected.

“It’s okay. I trust you.” Jongin said, his eyes were back on the books.

Kyungsoo walked towards the taller, hoping that he didn’t get red all over. He could feel his cheeks getting warmer.

* * *

“He seems so much more attractive than that kid, you know, the tall guy with weird ears.”

“The tall guy with weird ears is called Chanyeol and he is right here.” Chanyeol deadpanned at some girl Jihyo brought along with her. _Nayeon, her name was?_

“Oh. Sorry.” She replied with a small smile on her lips. _Very believable._

“Still, he’s the only attractive boy in this boring town right now.” Sooyoung agreed with the other girl, giggling shyly.

“If this town is so boring, why don’t you leave it?” Kyungsoo scoffed, raising his eyes from his book at the pretty girl sitting on the grass. And earned himself a death glare from Joohyun.

“Still, she’s right.” Jihyo started talking timidly. “He really looks good.” She talked very little and even _she_ was willing to express how good looking Jongin was. Today was a total nightmare in Kyungsoo’s eyes.

“Yeah sure, glorify the new guy. Like you’ve never met any other man before.” Johnny said, puffing his cheeks in annoyance before sitting down on the ground next to Sooyoung.  _Idiots._

Kyungsoo wished that he had stayed inside. It was too hot and he was tired of listening to people ramble about Jongin. They gawked at the taller boy like he was some kind of god.  _He did look like a god,_  that stupid, little voice talked in the back of Kyungsoo's head.

He stood up from the ground to drink some water. His throat felt like a desert and if he stayed there a little longer, he was going to strangle someone.

They placed the table decked with drinks and fruits under the shadow of the huge tree so the drinks wouldn’t get warm immediately. He wished that the table was even further, he could walk away and run into the woods.

He leaned down on the table and grabbed a bottle. The coolness on the surface of the glass felt good against his skin.

“Give me some.” Hearing Baekhyun’s voice, he reached out for the other bottle.

Kyungsoo felt a hand on his shoulder as he was about to pass the water to his friend and suddenly a hand grabbed the bottle. Jongin. The taller one guzzled down the water.

He was sweaty from playing volleyball all day, under the sun. The droplets of sweat drippled from his smooth, firm muscles.

Oh, yes. He wasn’t wearing a shirt. None of them were actually. Considering that it was hot as hell, it would’ve been a suicide. So was looking at Jongin's body.

“This is unfair.” Kyungsoo remembered Joohyun oppose earlier, “Why are the guys allowed to take off their shirts and we have to keep them?”

“You don’t.” Kyungsoo said pointing at Sooyoung. She was just wearing her bikini top and a cut-off jeans.

“Take yours off.” Chanyeol joked. “I’d like to see that.” He smiled like an idiot after his remarks, earning a punch on his stomach. If Joohyun didn’t do that, Kyungsoo would’ve. He remembered the petite girl being shy about his figure even though she's one of the prettiest people that Kyungsoo has ever met.

Kyungsoo’s attention turned back on Jongin as the latter wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. _How can someone at seventeen be this well-built_ , Kyungsoo thought. _Oh, nineteen._  Jongin corrected him before at Daehyun’s store.

 _I’m two years older than you, you should bow to me._  Kyungsoo laughed it off, punching him on the arm.

That small memory now seemed long gone and kind of annoying. Just like Jongin himself now. _Very annoying._

He freed his shoulder from Jongin’s grasp and took a step back. The taller one must have noticed, because now his eyes were fixed on Kyungsoo instead of the game the others were still playing.

Jongin handed the bottle to Baekhyun, his piercing gaze never leaving Kyungsoo.

“You’re too tense, Soo.” He placed his hand on Kyungsoo’s shoulder again, trying to rub the stiff spot.

Kyungsoo tried to fight against it but Jongin’s hold was strong. “Come here, Jihyo.” He called out to the girl in a cute way. _Sly bastard._  “Don’t you think he’s too tense?”

He took Jihyo’s hand and put it where his hand was. The girl smiled a little, shyly rubbing the spot. “Yeah, Soo. You need to relax.”

Kyungsoo pushed the girl’s hand in a not-so-kind manner and turned to face Jongin.

“Don’t call me Soo.” He was surprised how calm and deep his voice came out while he had a strong feeling to punch Jongin in the face. “Only my friends can call me that.” Rolling his eyes, he walked towards the house.

Better to stay in his room and read a book than stay around here, watch Jongin steal his friends’ hearts one by one and being irritated by him.

Yeah. It was sure a big mistake to introduce Jongin to his friends.

* * *

“Baby? You seem pale, are you okay?” Kyungsoo cursed himself internally when he heard his mother’s worried tone.

“I’m fine, it’s just the sun.” The petite woman leaned away from the kitchen counter and walked towards Kyungsoo. He leaned into her touch like a cat when she placed her hand on his cheek.

“You’re warm, really. Go to yoor room and lay down a little.” Kyungsoo felt an urge to hug his mom, so he did. They always had a good, open relationship. He's alwats felt relaxed in his mother’s arms.

Also, yeah, he was a little warmer. Not because of _the sun_ though, but he was not going to say it out loud.

He planted a small kiss on his mother’s peachy cheek and stepped out of the kitchen, starting to climb the stairs.

Reaching his room, he instantly stepped into the bathroom, he needed to freshen up.

Kyungsoo removed his shorts - the only piece of clothe he was wearing and threw himself under the cold water. He needed to cool down, _get it?_ _Huh, I’m miserable,_ he thought. _Making jokes to myself._

He got even more pissed as he recalled the scene from earlier. He never went through stuff like that with the other kids. Hell, he’s become friends with other kids. But with Jongin, no, he caught everyone’s attention and Kyungsoo was starting to feel lonely. Even Baekhyun was spending more time with Jongin, laughing at his stupid jokes.

There were a few things that Kyungsoo wasn’t so sure of, though. Like, did he really not like Jongin because he was drawing everyone’s attention or was it because of Jongin, who never paid him attention ever since their little trip to the bookstore?

He shook his head and turned off the water, he didn’t need to think about these. _Why did he think about these?_ It’s not like he cares.

He couldstill hear the laughters coming from the garden. _It’s going to be a long day._

As he exited the bathroom with only a towel hanging from his waist, he wanted to throw himself out of the window for not taking clothes with him.

Because currently, Jongin was standing next to the nightstand and staring at Kyungsoo in bewilderment. His widened eyes moved to Kyungsoo’s waist and lingered on the white towel more than they should.

Kyungsoo could feel his cheeks getting warmer but he didn’t know if the reason was his anger or his embarrassement. _Anger,_ he decided.

“I’m sorry!” Another loud laughter was heard from the garden and brought Jongin back to his senses. His voice came out as a shriek.

“Get out.” His tone was firmer than he expected. _Good._ So Jongin woud know that he was annoyed. Jongin’s lips parted as if he was about to say something but Kyungsoo was quicker. “Get. Out.” He let the two words out, making sure to emphasize them.

Jongin pressed his lips together, forming a straight line and walked out of the room.

Kyungsoo locked the old door after him, inhaling deeply.

He put on a clean white t-shirt and a black sweatpants. He laid down on the bed but he knew that he wouldn’t be able to sleep. There were a lot in his mind to sleep.

He was confused. He didn’t understand why there was a weight in his chest. And he was irritated. He wished that he went to Korea to see Minseok like the older wanted him to. He's been always understanding with Kyungsoo. Jongdae, Minseok's boyfriend was as same as Baekhyun. Kyungsoo enjoyed their presense. He really should've gone back to his home town.

He straightened up from the bed after a while and stepped towards the window. His friends were still there, the volleyball was left to a side. They were now chatting in a circle.

Kyungsoo looked around to see Jongin but he wasn’t there. Sooyoung wasn’t there either. _Oh. Could they be?_ Kyungsoo shook his head slowly, trying to chase away his thoughts.

He unlocked the door of his room and walked down the stairs, feeling a little dizzy. Maybe the sun really fucked him up. His head hurt now.

He entered the wide living room. His father was seated on the comfortable couch, reading a book in a corner. He lifted his head from the book he was holding and smiled to his son with tired eyes.

Kyungsoo didn’t see his mother or the Kims around as he moved to the furthest corner of the room, where his father’s piano was. It’s been a while since he played.

He could already feel the relief filling his veins as he touched the smooth ivories.

* * *

Kyungsoo leaned back on his chair, grabbing another bottle of beer. He didn’t like the taste of the cold drink but maybe getting drunk would help him forget the scene in front of him. He wasn’t sure if one could get drunk with beer but still, he was insistent to try and see.

“They seem to like each other.” Chanyeol remarked in a mocking tone, his mouth still full with the cookies Jihyo cooked.

 _No one asked,_  Kyungsoo wanted to snap at the taller, _keep your stupid opinions to yourself._

“Finish your bite before you talk, you disgusting pig.” Baekhyun talked instead. 

Remember when Kyungsoo thought it was going to be a long day? Well, apparently _the night_ was going to be even longer.

They were out as a group, just like they always did once in a week. They went to this club in town, Kyungsoo’s parents knew the owner. It was an open-air bar, the alcohol was cheeper for them thanks to Kyungsoo's parents. He should thank them because he's gonna need a lot tonight.

 _Why don’t you go with them,_  Kyungsoo’s mom insisted to Jongin, _you already know his friends._  Kyungsoo rolled his eyes so hard, he thought he was going lose his sight.

Here they were now. Meanwhile Kyungsoo was listening to his stupid friends rant about stuff that he didn’t care about, Jongin was swinging with Sooyoung on the dance ground. His strong arms holding her securely. They seemed to be talking about something.

“They’ll fuck tonight.” Kyungsoo cringed at Chanyeol’s words, scrunching his face at the idea as if he was about to throw up. It was probably true though. Kyungsoo didn’t understand why he was frustrated thinking about it. They were adults, they were free to do whatever they wanted.

“Shut up.” Joohyun pinched Chanyeol’s upper arm angrily. "She's your sister, have some respect!" Kyungsoo grinned at her actions even though he couldn’t make sense of them. Why was she always so angry or irritated whenever someone joked or even talked about Sooyoung?

“What?” Chanyeol protested with his deep voice. Kyungsoo really liked his friend’s voice, it was calming usually. When Chanyeol used it right. “If it’s not Sooyoung, then someone else.” He took a sip from his beer and turned to Kyungsoo. “Everyone seems to like your boy.”

“My boy?” Kyungsoo glanced at his friend, eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“Jongin.” Chanyeol said like it was obvious.

“He’s not _my boy._ ” He snickered at Chanyeol, leaning down to the table to get another bottle.

“Your guest then. Whatever.” Chanyeol pushed his bottle forward on the table. “Why are you two so cranky today?” Chanyeol pointed at Kyungsoo and Joohyun. He seemed resentful that everyone refused to keep up with him and his jokes.

Kyungsoo prepared himself for a bity remark but he heard the music get faster and louder. He turned his gaze to forward and saw people start dancing, jumping on the dance floor. What was that? Bowie?

He didn’t care. Jongin didn’t care about him. Cool. He could do the same.

He sloshed his beer down in one go and turned to the table as the bitter taste of the drink burned his throat a little.

Jihyo was sitting closest to him. Unlike earlier, he grabbed her hand kindly and led her to the dance floor. He started dancing around aimlessly, Jihyo mirroring his moves as she released a cute chuckle.

He felt better now, having Jihyo in his arms. Maybe Jongin wouldn’t be able to ruin his summer after all.

* * *

Jongin was definitely _not_  going to ruin his summer.

After a few more beers and half an hour wasted while dancing, Kyungsoo took Jihyo’s hand into his and drove her away from the crowd.

“Where are we going?” She whispered slowly as they walked deeper into the woods.

“I want to swim. Come with me?” Kyungsoo gave her one of the looks he mastered. A look that he used on his mom when she didn’t let him do what he wanted.

Jihyo beamed, her chubby cheeks still visible under the weak moonlight. She looked adorable and Kyungsoo cursed himself for never realizing her.

The lake wasn’t too far and it wasn’t too long until they were stripped down to their underwears and stepping into the cold water.

After all that sweating, the water felt good. But still, there was a feeling lingering on his chest as Kyungsoo watched Jihyo swim away from him and then back to him with a wide grin on her face.

Jongin was still with Sooyoung, probably. Kyungsoo didn’t really pay attention to him as he took Jihyo to the lake. But now, listening to Jihyo’s laughter in this silent night, he was able to forget about the taller boy. He’d like to think that he did. Maybe he should spare more time to her.

“Let’s meet here again.” He whispered softly as he held the petite girl’s narrow waist under water. “Come meet me here tomorrow night.”

Kyungsoo could feel Jihyo nod slowly as she hid her face in the crook of Kyungsoo’s neck. He felt her warm breath on his skin.

* * *

"No objections! You're coming too."

"But mom-"

"What did I just say about objecting?"

Kyungsoo growled at his mother protestingly. Was this a fucking joke?

His mother woke them up telling that they were going for a swim. All of them. Both his family and the Kims. _Like little children._

Kyungsoo hoped that his mother was joking as she told them to get their swimsuits. But no. Apparently she was stark serious. 

She glared at Kyungsoo, preparing sandwiches.

 _You guys go,_  Kyungsoo wanted to say, _I am not coming._  But it was already a lost fight. He couldn't succeed against his mother. No one could.

"Jongin and you’re riding with me."

"Excuse me-"

"You really don't know when to stop do you, baby?" Her glare turned into a mocking expression with a wide smirk on her lips as she placed the last sandwich roll inside the basket. "Your father is taking his parents."

"You guys keep making plans for me." He hummed leaning down on the counter. "I'm going to run away one day." He crossed his arms on his chest, looking at his mother with a small pout on his lips. He thought maybe his mother would feel sorry and let him skip this one.

The look on her eyes softened. She placed a hand on her son's warm cheek.  _Did it work?_

She grinned even wider before she spoke. "Move your ass to the car."

He walked out of the kitchen, stomping his feet. His pouty expression still not leaving his mother's cunning one. There was no point. Mama Do always gets what she wants.

He nearly crashed into Sooyoung while walking towards the garden.

"Oh sorry. I couldn't see you."

"It's fine." She sent one of her glamorous smiles. _It probably wasn't too hard for Jongin to fall for her._  Kyungsoo felt a sudden pang on his chest with the thought.

"Is Jongin here?" She asked timidly.

"Yeah. Inside." He hoped that his smile didn't falter. “You like him.” It sounded more like a remark than a question. Her gaze turned to Kyungsoo from the house. Kyungsoo could swear that Sooyoung seemed panicked for a few seconds before she averted her gaze again.

“Can I go inside?” She mumbleed holding on to her bag tightly.

“Yeah, sure.” He gestured to the corridor as he started walking towards his mother’s car.

The weight on his chest was there again, bothering him. As if someone was stepping on his heart. He didn’t understand why he felt like this. Yet again, he didn’t understand a lot of things. Like why Sooyoung’s presence bothered him, why he felt saturnine when Jongin’s smiles were aimed at her and he didn’t understand why he couldn’t stop thinking about Jongin even when he was with someone else. Nothing made sense to him anymore.

He opened the car door and slipped inside, sitting next to the driver’s seat. He was not going to sit next to Jongin on the back seat.

Kyungsoo closed his eyes, leaning back on the seat. Taking deep breaths, he listened to the trees swish with the slight summer breeze. It was fine. He was okay.

Jongin was going to be gone after a few weeks and these meaningless feeling were going to be all forgotten. _He was okay._

“Why are you sitting in front?” Kyungsoo’s eyes fluttered open as he heard his mother speak. How did she even get close so silently?

“I felt like it.” He answered cockily as Jongin seated himself on the back. Kyungsoo tried hard not to look at his direction. He wondered why Sooyoung wasn’t with him.  

“Oh really?” His mom grinned a little, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, really.” Kyungsoo mimicked his mother’s tone. She squinted her eyes at her son as if she was examining him.

“Wait here.” She talked, her eyes moving between Kyungsoo and then Jongin. “I forgot the basket.” She started walking towards the house again.

Great. Now he was alone with Jongin. Maybe he should go to his father’s car.

“I don’t have the black death.” Jongin started speaking, interrupting Kyungsoo’s train of thought. “It wouldn’t kill you to sit next to me.” He sounded resentful. Like he had any right to. Kyungsoo scoffed loudly before he replied.

“Can’t I sit next to my mother?” He asked, not even looking at the other one. Jongin didn’t say anything. “She seems to like you a lot.” Kyungsoo kept talking, his eyes were fixed outside the window.

“Of course she does. Everyone’s moms like me. I'm a delight.” Jongin answered. Kyungsoo didn't look at him but he could feel the smirk on the latter’s lips.

“I’m not talking about mom.” Kyungsoo rolled his eyes, leaning back on his seat. “Sooyoung seems so smitten of you.” He heard a muffled noise from the back seat, Jongin straightens, probably. “She’s even more beautiful than last year.”

“Are you trying to get me to like her?” He could feel the arrogance through Jongin’s voice.

“What would be the harm in that?” Kyungsoo snickered back.

“No harm.” Jongin talked back almost instantly in a stern tone. “I’d like to do these things on my own, if you don’t mind.” He sounded annoyed. 

Well done Kyungsoo, he cursed internally. He did not only got Jongin upset, but now, Kyungsoo also knew for sure that the latter actually liked Sooyoung. Great.

“Just quit playing the good host.” Jongin kept talking. “I know you don’t like me.”

Kyungsoo lowered his eyes on his hands, the pale skin is full of scratches. He really needed to stop playing with every cat he found on the roads.

His mom was finally back inside the car, giving a confused look to the unusually silent boys.

_I know you don’t like me._

_Funny,_ Kyungsoo thinks as the car engine purred, _I think it’s actually the exact opposite._

He knew it now. He wasn’t annoyed with Jongin. He didn’t hate the taller one. He hated the fact that everyone was getting his attention but Kyungsoo. He hated the fact that Jongin liked everyone but him.

And he hated the fact that he had the audacity to fall in love with someone that didn’t even like him a bit.

 _It’s really funny,_  Kyungsoo thinks. How these realisation suddenly come to people.

He wished that he never spoke at the first place.

* * *

Kyungsoo had no idea how it happened. Was it their small trip to the town, to show Jongin the old bookstore? Was it small talks over books? Was it the way Jongin’s eyes sparkled talking about dancing? Was it all? Or was it seeing him with Sooyoung, triggering his jealousy?

He didn’t know if it was really love, he wasn’t sure. How can you fall for someone you only know for a week anyway? Not to mention that you haven’t been talking most of that time.

Kyungsoo was a fool. A fool who couldn’t even control his emotions.

He really wished Baekhyun was here next ot him, laying on the piece of cloth thrown over the sand. 

The beach seemed empty except for them and a few other small groups. “Go swim with Jongin.” His mom whispered while his father bantered about something with the other family.

“I don’t want to.” Kyungsoo replied wearily. 

“I don’t understand, you guys seemed fine and now-”

“I followed you here, what more do you want me to do?” He surprised his mother with his angered but still low voice. He surprised himself too, he’d never dare to speak his mother like this.

Kyungsoo needed to calm down. He stood up on his feet, releasing a deep sigh and started walking away from the crowd. Oblivious to the pair of eyes watching him from the water.

* * *

“Is your father home?” He heard someone talk as he walked aimlessly through the beach. He looked up to meet the owner of the voice. Eliott. The son of the archeologist who lived in the town.

Kyungsoo’s father has been good friends with the man, considering his interest in, well, he got interest in anything ancient, Kyungsoo thought to himself.

“No, they’re at the beach.” He gestured behind himself.

“Oh, okay.” The tall boy started walking towards the direction Kyungsoo pointed. “My father digged up some statue from the sea.” The blond one spoke again. “If you wanna see.”

Did Kyungsoo start having daydreams or did that boy just wink at him?

Nodding slowly, he kept walking. He could meet with his father and ask him if he could go back home after he arrived too. The charming man wouldn’t probably hear himself say no, giving all his attention to whatever they found in the sea.

* * *

“Where’s your father?” Axel, Eliott’s father, inquired him while cleaning some rock.

“What, I’m not enough?” Kyungsoo answered, trying to act resentful but instantly failing as he saw the middle aged man smile wide. He approached to Axel.

“Sure you are, my boy. Come here.” He handed Kyungsoo the rock he was cleaning. “Look at the slit in the middle.” Kyungsoo glanced at the spot the other pointed at. He could see the shades of green dance around each other inside the little hole.

“It’s beautiful.” He sounded mesmerized. He was mesmerized.

His father was more interested in these sort of stuff but sometimes Kyungsoo joined them too. And he was always satisfied with whatever Axel showed him. It was hard but it was a ravishing profession being an archeologist.

“It’s emerald.” The older man grinned cunningly as if he was giving away some secret.

“Did you take out some rocks?” They turned to the owner of the voice. “Don’t tell me I came here to see some rocks.” Kyungsoo’s father stared at Axel in exasparation. Axel laughed loudly but Kyungsoo only smiled a little.

Jongin was with his father. Kyungsoo saw Eliott smile at him from behind the tanned boy.

“Of course not. Come with me.” Axel gestured the group of people. “C’mon Soo.” He grabbed the emerald from Kyungsoo and linked their arms.

Kyungsoo, Axel and Eliott got on a boat while his father, Jongin and Axel’s asistant got on another. They shoved off towards a floating platform in the middle of the calm sea. Some other small boats and scuba divers were surrounding it.

A steel cable connected to a winch was lowered into the water, steadied by other workers.

“Watch.” Kyungsoo felt Eliott’s hand on his back. Again, not noticing the pair of eyes glaring at the blond boy’s hand.

“Would you look at that.” He heard Axel talk as they pulled out the worn out statue.

They waited for a few minutes, Eliott’s hand never leaving Kyungsoo. The warmness was kind of bothersome but Kyungsoo didn’t mind. He could use some attention. _Petty,_ he thought to himself. He couldn’t believe he could get this low but there he was, seeking attention from people he’s never paid any attention to because his crush didn’t care about him.

Finally the cable was pulled back up with an antique statue out of the water. Axel and Kyungsoo’s father edged closer, watching the operation minutely.

It was missing an arm but it was secured next to the statue. The divers made sure the statue left water safe and sound.

Later, they were back on the beach. The statue has been dried and cleaned. Kyungsoo’s father seemed busy talking with Axel and the others who helped take out the statue.

Jongin, on the other hand, seemed awfully interested in the statue, caressing it gently like it could break any moment. 

“Here.” Eliott was near him, coming out of nowhere. He was holding out the statue’s missing arm. Kyungsoo took it into his hands slowly, scared to damage it somehow.

“I was thinking-”

“Eliott!” Axel interrupted his son’s sentence, gesturing him to join them.

“Sorry.” The blond one smiled apologetically before walking towards his father. Kyungsoo nodded with a smile. He was glad that the other needed to go away, he weirded Kyungsoo out a little.

Kyungsoo glanced at Jongin who swiftly turned his head towards the opposite direction. _Was he watching me?_

The sun was slowly setting, casting its last rays on the damaged statue. And Jongin. He looked beautiful under the fading sunlight.

“Who would like to go for a swim before we head back?” Kyungsoo’s father asked, approaching them with a smile on his face.

“Sure.” Jongin returned his smile.

Kyungsoo watched his father walk towards the water, taking out his shirt. Axel and Eliott joined him too. Jongin was still standing next to Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo felt an urge to do something, he was still holding on to the cold, eroded marble. He then turned to the taller one, his eyes lingering on the boy longer than necessary. He stretchesd out the arm he was holding. He looked up at Jongin’s eyes.

“Peace?” He offered, raising his eyebrows.

Jongin’s smile was a tired one, but Kyungsoo could feel his sincerity. Jongin grabbed the statue’s arm- hand.

Kyungsoo placed the missing piece next to the statue itself and they headed for the sea.

It was almost dark, the sun was almost gone know as they splashed water at each other, swimming and playing in the cold water.

“Your mother’s going to kill me.” His father chuckled inside the car as they dried themselves with the small towels they got from Axel. “Not we’re only late, but we also wetted the car.” Thay laughed loud as the car engine stopped in the wide garden.

Late.

They were late.

_He was late._

Fuck.

_He forgot about Jihyo._

He stepped out from the car in haste, not answering his father’s questions. Fuck. How could he forget? He was the one asking the girl to meet him.

“Jihyo?” He breathed out as he reached the lake. “Jihyo? You here?”

No reply.

Of course not.

_Fuck._

* * *

The peace didn’t last long. At least for Kyungsoo. Everytime he watched Jongin laugh with Sooyoung, talk with Sooyoung, walk away with Sooyoung, he felt a pang spread on his chest. It was like a torch, piercing his body.

Today was no different. Except for the thunderstorm maybe. They didn’t expect this, the weather reports said it’ll be sunny all week.

Now he was stuck inside the house.

Kyungsoo heard other voices along the heavy rain pounding the windows.

Jongin’s laugh. And then Sooyoung’s.

He stood up from his bed, placing his book on the nighstand. He walked towards the balcony but immediately regretted the action.

Here they were. _Young lovers._  Playing around in the rain. It must be fun. Not that Kyungsoo would know.

He walked back inside, sitting on his bed. He took his head between his hands, covering his ears as if he could block the voices. He wanted to sink into the bed, to disappear.

They faded away in a few minutes. There. They left again. God knew to do what. Kyungsoo felt like the room was closing in on him. His heart clenched inside his chest. When did his feelings get so intense?

He lifted himself from his bed again, walking out of his room.

Downstairs, he found his father sitting in the couch like days before. The other man sent him a smile as Kyungsoo slumped down next to him.

“You okay?” His father sounded slightly worried.

“Yeah.” _No._  “Don’t worry.” _My chest hurt._

“Have you seen my Heptameron?” Kyungsoo’s mother walked in before his father could ask anything else.

“It must be over there.” His father answered his wife who was walking inside the living room in haste. She loved reading stories from that book.

The woman approached to them, grabbing the book from behind the bookshelf.

“Where are Jongin’s parents?” He actually wanted to ask about Jongin but there was no smooth way to do it.

“They have some business in the town, honey.” Kyungsoo spreaded on the couch, his head on his mother’s thighs and his legs on his father’s. “They left earlier, before the storm. Apparently they took shelter inside a hotel.” His father chuckled lightly. “They called a few hours ago.”

“And I guess Jongin left with Sooyoung.” His mother talked in a soft tone. Kyungsoo nodded and faked a smile. He mastered those smiles by now. “I’ll read to you.” His mother caressed his hair as she opened the book with her free hand.

“A handsome young knight was madly in love with a princess. She too was in love with him.” She started off with a gentle voice. “Though she seemed not to be entirely aware of it. Despite the friendship that blossomed between them, or perhaps because of that very friendship, the young knight found himself so humbled and speechless that he was totally unable to bring up the subject of his love. One day he asked the princess : ‘Is it better to speak or die?’.”

The lights suddenly went off inside the room, leaving it in the dark. The thunder roared outside.

“I’d never have the courage to ask such a question.” Kyungsoo mumbled without thinking. He cursed himself internally, seeing his father’s soft, but questioning expression. His mother’s probably wasn’t any different.

“You know, you can talk to us about anything.” His father reached out to hold his hand. Kyungsoo didn’t have the energy to talk so he just smiled again.

They kept sitting in soothing darkness. Listening to the rain drops beat against the window panes. Kyungsoo missed moments like these. When it was only him and his parents. He missed those times when they didn’t invite people for the summer and preferred to stay alone.

He missed those times even more now.

* * *

“You know you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, right?” The small cat purred on his lap, nuzzling closer to Kyungsoo. “It’s been a long time I’ve come to visit you, hasn’t it? Sorry, I was busy with other stuff.” Other people. _Person._

The small creature on his lap kept purring nonchalantly.

It was nice sitting next to the running river, being alone for once.

He’s been taking care of the kitten ever since he found the scared animal in a tree hollow. He forgot the easily frightened little thing for two weeks, since Jongin arrived. Idiot.

Now, he’s been sitting on the wet grass, the cat fast asleep on his thighs after he fed him well. The half empty pocket of cat food laid next to them.

It felt good, being away from all that bull. Being forced to hang out with Jongin, watching him giggle with Sooyoung, watch his friends swoon over the tanned boy.

He gave up trying to befriend the older one, he was just hoping that Jongin would leave and everything would go back to how it was.

Still, everytime he saw Jongin have fun with the others, his heart clenched inside. Those were his friends and it seemed like they already forgot about him. I’m not that interesting after all, I guess.

Jongin didn’t seem to care anyway. He seemed pretty content when Baekhyun laughed at his every joke. He was totally okay with Chanyeol challenging him for another round of basketball game. Kyungsoo won’t even talk about Sooyoung.

Joohyun seemed like the only one besides Kyungsoo who didn’t care for Jongin. She just glared at him everytime he spoke. She was barely present anymore anyway. Maybe Kyungsoo should talk to her sometime. The girl also stopped hanging out with the group just like Kyungsoo.

A noise from his side interrupted his thoughts. Another cat, a bigger one was messing with the pocket. Kyungsoo straightened up a little, he grabbed a palm full of food, trying to not wake the kitten on his lap.

He stretched out his hand to the other one. The cat seemed timid at first, it approached Kyungsoo slowly, sniffling his hand. It started to eat the food hastily after deciding that Kyungsoo was no threat.

Maybe Kyungsoo should’ve just laid down the pocket and let the cat eat from there. He felt a pang of pain inside his palm as the cat bit into his skin.

He withdrawed his hand with a hiss, stirring in his place. The kitten slowly opened his eyes at the smallest move and realized the other cat. He stood up on Kyungsoo’s lap lazily, yawning wide.

After looking at the other cat one more time, he left Kyungsoo’s lap and jumped on the bigger cat. Kyungsoo, not knowing what to do, watched the scene in front of him before deciding to break it before the kitten gets destroyed. But then again, how do you break a cat fight?

Being the huge buffoon he is, Kyungsoo tried to break it off using his hands. A big, big mistake.

The big cat scratched his hand really bad this time. The redness of blood immediately colored his pale skin. He took a few steps back, hissing in pain.

_Fuck._

He took the cat food, dumping some near a tree. The bigger one instantly ran towards it, the smaller following it.

Kyungsoo grabbed the kitten with his free, bloody hand and moved him to under the shadow of an other tree, dumping some more.

Then he walked towards the river, hoping that the little monsters would stay calm as he washed the blood away. His hand hurt a lot. The cut was probably deeper than it looked. He needed a first aid kit.

He took out his shirt and pressed it on the cut. He could’ve just cut a piece and use that but cut it with what? Just destroy the entire shirt, right?

He felt something brush his leg. The other cat. “Go away.” He pushed the big fluff ball gently.

Kyungsoo started walking back to his bike that he placed on the edge of the road. “I’ll be back. Don’t kill each other!” He screamed at the cats as if they could understand him. He did try to break a cat fight thinking that he wouldn’t get hurt. Don’t question his intelligence.

* * *

No one was present in the garden. Good. He didn’t want anyone to see this mess.

He stepped inside the house, taking a towel from the kitchen and changing it with his t-shirt which was drenched in blood. How did he lose so much blood anyway? Oh boy, did that stupid cat cut into a vein? Was he going to die?

 _Don’t be stupid,_ his senses talked to him _. It’s a just a scratch you fucking drama queen._

His father wasn't in his room. That was a shame, he’d know what to do.

Kyungsoo walked inside his mother’s office but it was empty as well. Maybe she was in the library. 

Kyungsoo moved towards the wide room, spotting Jongin sitting in a chair. He immediately hid his hand behind. “Where’s my mom?” He asked trying to keep his voice calm.

“She left for town, with mine.”

Kyungsoo heaved a sigh annoyedly. Why did his mom have to leave when he needed her?

“Is something wrong?” Jongin asked in a sweet voice, one he used while talking to Sooyoung. Kyungsoo wanted to throw up right there and then..

“No. Everything’s perfect.” Kyungsoo barely contained himself from rolling his eyes. Why was he acting nice? Like I don’t know it’s a play.

“Where’s your t-shirt?” Jongin seemed amused by Kyungsoo’s exasparation. _Asshole._

“That doesn’t concern you.”

“What are you hiding?” Jongin got up on his feet, walking towards him.

“N-nothing.” Fuck. He stuttered and Jongin smirked as he keeps approaching Kyungsoo.

Jongin stood in front of him before leaning down. His face was too close, Kyungsoo could see the way his eyelashes moved as Jongin blinked.

The latter stretched out his arms around Kyungsoo’s sides, eyes never leaving Kyungsoo’s. He took Kyungsoo’s hands in his and brought them between the two boys.

“What happened?” His expression instantly changed when he noticed the bloody towel.

“The cat scratched.”

“A cat scratch wouldn’t cause this much bleeding.”

“It was a big cat.” Kyungsoo mumbled and Jongin chuckled softly at that.

“Does your mother have a first aid kit?”

“Yeah.” Kyungsoo gulped a little. “In her office.”

They stepped around the house, Jongin’s hand never letting go of Kyungsoo’s.

Their faces were once again really close as Jongin placed Kyungsoo in one of the chairs and pulled another for himself.

He pressed the cotton dripped into disinfectant on Kyungsoo’s skin. Kyungsoo tried to retrieve his hand from Jongin’s hold as the cotton burned his skin but the latter was stronger.

Jongin leaned down and blowed the wound to lessen the ache Kyungsoo’s feeling.

After he’s done applying the plaster, he still didn’t let go of Kyungsoo’s hand. Jongin seemed like he wanted to say something, but he kept silent. He looked at Kyungsoo with a longing expression. Or Kyungsoo thought so. Why would Jongin long for him anyway?

Uncomfortable because of the silence falling onto them, Kyungsoo got up from his seat. “I should change.” He stuttered again under Jongin’s strong gaze. Jongin nodded a little and released Kyungsoo’s hand.

It was a shame. Kyungsoo thought his hand perfectly fitted into Jongin’s.

* * *

Kyungsoo listened to the laughters from the garden as he entered the bathroom. His mom must be back.

He washed his face, trying to avoid his scratched hand. Putting on clean clothes, he slowly climbed down the stairs, feeling a little dizzy.

His mom planted a small kiss on his cheeks when he greetsedher and the other woman.

“Baby, are you okay?” She asked with a worried expression after realizing her son’s band-aided hand.

“It’s fine, cat scratch. Jongin took care of it.” Her mother raised an eyebrow to that and turned to Jongin to thank, who was sitting on a chair across them.

“I saw Jihyo today, in Daehyun’s store.” His mother stated after they were all seated around the table. “She hasn’t been coming here for a couple of days. Is everything okay?” His mother continued with curious eyes.

Kyungsoo saw Jongin tense across him, straigtening up on his seat.

Jihyo hasn’t showed up since Kyungsoo stood her up. Being the dense idiot he was, Kyungsoo didn’t even bother to apologize.

“Do you know if she’s busy tonight? Did she say anything?”

“I think she’ll stay at home. She seemed a little tired.”

Kyungsoo nodded and stood up from his chair hastily and walked inside the living room. He brought out the phonebook and dialled Jihyo’s house number. Luckily it was her who answered.

“Hey, it’s Kyungsoo.”

“Oh. Hi.” She sounded surprised.

“Are you free tonight?” There was no need to dance around it. He needed to see the girl.

“Kyungsoo, I don’t think-”

“Please?” He asked almost beggingly. “I want to make it up to you.”

“Okay.” Kyungsoo heard her whisper after listening to her breathing for a few seconds. “I don’t have any plans.” She released a sigh.

”Great! Get ready, I’ll come and get you in half an hour.”

He waited for Jihyo to hang up and walked back into his room.

He took out the jeans Joohyun bought for him from his closet. Your ass looks good in these, she said.

He put on a pink, thin button up and grabbed his denim jacket. After a few strokes he decided that he couldn’t fight his hair and leaves his room.

Everyone was still in the garden.  

“I’m meeting Jihyo.” He announced kissing his mother on the cheek. “I’ll be late.”

He stepped towards the garden door hurriedly, he was going to walk and he didn’t want to be late again.

He stepped out of the door, not realizing the pair of eyes watching him with sadness.

* * *

He arrived the town earlier than he expected. Daehyun’s store was still open even though the old man usually closed it before the sun goes down. After a few seconds of contemplating, he decided to get something for Jihyo.

“That kid you brought spends his time here. He’s always here, it’s kind of annoying.” Daehyun said while Kyungsoo was going through the shelves.

“Are you sure? He’s usually with his girlfriend.” He felt a pang on his chest with the last word.

“Tall, tanned, small eyes, full lips, brown hair?”

“You seem to have studied him well.”

“Because he’s always here. Always. And he’s alone.” Kyungsoo chuckled at his exasperation.

But still, why? He always left with Sooyoung. Why didn’t he bring her here?

Whatever. This evening wasn’t about them, Kyungsoo told himself. Don’t think about them.

“I’m closing, Soo. Hurry." He heard Daehyun talk in between a yawn.

* * *

He noticed a slender girl standing in front of the door when he arrived at Jihyo’s house. She wore a pretty, lilac dress that highlighted her figure. She looked like Jihyo but her hair was shorter, under her ears.

Kyungsoo tapped the girl’s shoulder. He wasn’t wrong. He realized it was Jihyo when she turned towards him.

“You look beautiful.” He said in a fascinated tone. And she did, really.

“Thank you.” She smiled shyly. They stood in silence for a few seconds before Kyungsoo gestured her to walk.

“So, where are we going?”

“That’s a surprise.” Kyungsoo winked at her.

The sun has set down. The streets they walked shone with the lights from the stores.

He took her to his favorite ice cream place. It wasn’t anything big but he enjoyed this place. It was quiet while many other stores were filled with children.

“This place is amazing. They pour some chocolate sauce on the scoops and it freezes immediately. It’s-”

“Kyungsoo.” Jihyo interrupted him, a disturbed expression lingered on her face. “Why did you call me?”

“I wanted to see you. And apologize for that night. Oh!” He remembered the book. “Here.”

“What’s that?”

“Apology.” He smiled softly at the latter. She chuckled a little and opened the wrapping paper.

“Le Rouge et Le Noir.” She read the title with her perfect french.

When you spent your entire summer in another country, doing nothing, learning a new language seemed like a good option.

Thanks to his mother forcing him on it, Kyungsoo could speak Italian and English fluently, but he still had problems with French. Jihyo on the other hand, was way better than their friends. At least that’s what Joohyun said.

“I wanted to read it in its original language but it’s hard. I don’t think you’ll have any problems.”

“Why this one though?”

“It’s one of my favorites. A man torn between two women, two kinds of love. I hope you like it. It’s not only about love too, it touches many subjects like the army, the religion, passions-”

“Kyungsoo.” She interrupted him again. “Thank you.” Kyungsoo nodded a little, smiling slowly. “People who read a lot have always seemed mysterious to me.” She started talking again after they grabbed their ice creams. “You read a lot too.”

“I seem mysterious to you?” Kyungsoo raised his eyebrows, sending a cocky smile to Jihyo.

“Yeah. I don’t think those people show who they really are. Or what they actually feel.” Kyungsoo stopped eating and looked up at her. They stared at each other in silence for a while.

 “I-”

“I think you’re going to break my heart.” She whispered. “I don’t want that.” Kyungsoo’s eyes stayed fixed on his hand. The one Jongin took care of today. “I think I should go home.” She kept her voice low.

“I’ll walk you.”

“It’s fine-”

“That’s the least I can do. Please?” He asked timidly.

After paying for the wasted ice creams, they walked slowly, not saying a word. It was comforting actually, the silence between them. Kyungsoo didn’t even realize they arrived her house before Jihyo stopped walking.

Jihyo sent him a reassuring smile as she leaned down to plant a small kiss on his cheek. Her soft lips gently touched his skin.

“Take care. Thank you for the book.” She didn’t walk into her house instantly, her eyes lingered on Kyungsoo for a few seconds before she started talking again. “Don’t lie to yourself, Kyungsoo. Do whatever you want to do, feel whatever you want to.”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to make of that.”

“I think you do.” She stepped inside.

She was right. Kyungsoo knew. He just didn’t want to accept it.

He started walking home. He took a look at his scratched hand. He recalled Jongin’s soft touches. How Jongin wouldn’t let go of his hand.

He was so fucked.

* * *

He walked back home even slower. He said he’ll be late and he was returning before it’s been an hour. What was he supposed to tell his mom? I’m dumped but not really because we weren’t even dating? What a fucking loser.

And Jongin. Fuck. Kyungsoo could already see the mocking smirk he’ll wear.

Maybe he should go to Baekhyun’s. But no, he was angry at him.

He kept walking, groaning loudly in the middle of the road. Only the fireflies witnessed his miserableness.

He arrived the house half an hour later, occasionally stopping to gaze at the night sky. It was clear and full of stars.

He found the folks seated on the chairs scattered around the table. Everyone was holding one of those huge wine glasses. Kyungsoo never understood why those glasses had to be so big. It didn’t even look good and most of the time, they didn’t fit in your hand.

“Baby?” His mother was the first one to notice his presence. “I thought you were going to be late?” Kyungsoo pursed his lips into a smile. His mother was quick to catch that he didn’t want to talk. “You want to join us?”

“Thanks, I’m a bit tired.”

“Too tired to play for us?” His father asked, lips breaking into a sweet smile.

Kyungsoo grinned at his father as he gestured everyone to follow him to the living room. They all did, taking their glasses with them.

Removing his jacket, he sat down before the piano. After a few seconds of thinking, he started pressing the ivories.

Everyone was silent as Kyungsoo played the gloomy notes of Bach’s Aria. In seconds, he’s closed his eyes, slowly swinging back and forth as his fingers move.

He took a deep breath as he finishes. He cracked his eyes open hearing them applaud for the short performance. He stood up and bowed to his audience smiling a little. He felt better now.

His eyes wandered on the people around the room until he spotted Jongin. He was sitting on the bottom step of the stairs, watching Kyungsoo with a fond expression. Just like that day in Daehyun’s store.

Kyungsoo won’t buy it this time.

He bowed one last time. Grabbing his jacket, he started climbing the steps, not even sparing Jongin a glance.

Kyungsoo entered his room and changed quickly before Jongin could walk in and he reached for a pillow. He was tired, both physically and mentally. He needed to sleep.

“Sleep on the bed. You seem-”

“We already talked about this.” Kyungsoo interrupted Jongin, trying to sound annoyed on purpose. He didn’t even notice him walk in.

“Then we’ll sleep together.” What? “We can fit in together.” Kyungsoo turned to him, expression bewildered.

“No.”

“I won’t bother you.”

“We don’t need to be in the same bed for you to bother me.” Really, Kyungsoo? Really? What a fucking idiot. “I said no.”

“It’ll be fine.” Jongin moved closer to him, grabbing the pillow from his hands. He didn’t seem affected by Kyungsoo’s words. Why was he trying so hard?

“Fine.” He’d keep up the arguing but he really was tired and his back hurt. Those were the only reasons. He swore to himself.

They placed themselves on the bed. Kyungsoo stretched his feet next to Jongin’s head. He was scared that he’d cuddle the taller if they slept in the same position.

“Good night, Kyungsoo.”

“Good night, Jongin.”

It was not really a good night when Kyungsoo suddenly woke up a few hours later, Jongin’s foot on his face. He pushed it away in a not-so-gentle way and groaned loud enough for Jongin to wake up.

“This isn’t working. I’m going back on the floor.” He straightened up to move but Jongin held his arm.

“Wait.” He grabbed Kyungsoo’s blanket from the floor and folded it into a cylinder.

“What are you doing?”

“Dividing the bed into two.” He laid down on the bed again after putting the blanket in the middle. “Here.” He patted on the empty space for Kyungsoo to move there. And Kyungsoo did.

Now there were in the same position, their shoulders could brush if the blanket wasn’t between them. Kyungsoo closed his eyes.

* * *

Something was heavy on his chest. Heavy and warm. Something else tickled his chin.

Kyungsoo slowly opened his eyes. The sunlight hit inside the room and brightened it softly. The curtain danced around the window frame with the light breeze.

His body felt like it was paralyzed under a weight. He looked down on his chest. Panic filled him in as he spotted the brown locks of hair.

Whatever this thing was, it was breathing. Kyungsoo felt their bodies touch as their chests raised with the breaths they took in.

Wait. He was in his bed. Right. Jongin said they could share the bed.

Oh. Jongin.

Jongin wasn’t next to him anymore.

Kyungsoo glanced at the older one again, he couldn’t see his face. How did they end up like this? Jongin was literally laying on him. He was still asleep considering his regular, slow breathing.

Kyungsoo would’ve been very please under different circumstances but currently, his whole body was aching with Jongin’s weight on him.

Kyungsoo wanted to caress his soft looking hair. He wanted to wrap his arms around the latter, enfolding him tightly. But no. He wasn’t not going to. He was a coward.

“Jongin.” He whispered. “Jongin, wake up.” The latter didn’t. He nuzzled into Kyungsoo’s neck even closer.

He could feel Jongin’s warm breath on his skin. Was this what Sooyoung feeling everyday? His heart tightened in his chest for a second.

“Jongin.” He said a tad louder this time. The latter stirred on him and slowly raised his head.

He stared at Kyungsoo for a while before his eyes widened and he pulled away with a shriek.

Kyungsoo sat up inside the bed, his aching muscles protesting. His hands moved to his neck to rub the stiffness away.

“I’m so sorry!” Jongin started talking, his voice cracking a little.

“It’s fine.” Kyungsoo cut him off, standing up to stretch. “I’m going to take a quick shower.” He tried to seem calm about what just happened. What the fuck did just happen?

He inhaled deeply as he locked the bathroom door. How did they end up one on the top of the other? Kyungsoo knew it was wrong but he couldn't help it. He liked having the other boy nuzzled into him.

He closed his eyes the cold water flowed down on him.

He couldn’t help but think how nice Jongin’s hair smelled.

* * *

“Morning, honey.”

“Good morning, mom.” Kyungsoo sat down on the hammock, next to his mother. He shook off the stun he went through this morning. Jongin wasn’t even there when he came out of the shower. What was Kyungsoo expecting? He was probably off to see Sooyoung.

“What are you doing here?” He asked his mother.

“Reading a book, as usual. You know I like it when it’s silent.” She leaned forward to stroke Kyungsoo’s damp hair.

“Yet you keep inviting noisy people.” He told her, making sure that she could sense the smugness through his voice. She laughed adorably. “Where are they?” The Kim couple weren’t around, he didn’t see them in the garden either.

“In town. They have something to take care of.” His mother explained, her eyes were fixed on the book she was holding.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit rude?” Kyungsoo asked bashfully. “I mean, you invited them here, to our house. They are everywhere but the house.”

Why was he even asking. It’s not like he cares. That was what he wanted anyway. Them, out of his house.

Kyungsoo’s mom laughed softly and sent him a knowing look.

“They need to take care of something. Actually I kind of forced them on it.” She put the book on her other side and embraced Kyungsoo, bringing him to her chest. “You seem troubled lately.” She stated as her gentle hand caressed Kyungsoo’s hair.

He wanted to talk to his mother. His parents have always been open-minded, never judged or interfered anyone’s privacy. They would understand.

He wanted to tell them what Jihyo told him. About lying to himself. Kyungsoo felt like he was ready to be honest now.

He wanted to tell his mother how frustrated he’s been feeling ever since Jongin arrived.

He wanted to ask her why did he always feel like someone’s stepping on his chest whenever he saw the latter with Sooyoung.

He wanted to tell her that whenever Jongin was near, he felt like he’s going to explode.

And he wanted to tell her that he wished all these feelings were gone because he knew that Jongin didn’t feel the same. That he’d never feel the same.

“I saw Jongin leave before you came.” Kyungsoo wanted to laugh. It was like she sensed that he was thinking about Jongin. “I really hoped you two would get along.”

“Why?”

“No particular reason.” There was a tone of mischievousness in her voice.

“Yeah, sure.” His mother chuckled softly as she wrapped her arms tighter around Kyungsoo.

“We talked a little.” Shit. He probably told her- complained to her about Kyungsoo’s behaviors and- “I think he likes you.”  

“What?” Kyungsoo couldn’t hide the bewilderment in his voice or his expression. She didn’t mean what Kyungsoo thought, right?

“Yeah, I think he wants to be friends.” Of-fucking-course. What else? “You should stop acting so cold."

“I’m not acting.”

“Kyungsoo.”

“You know I’m not good with people. And he seems just fine, stealing my friends.” His mother’s grip loosened with his words.

“He’s not stealing anyone, baby. You just stopped seeing them altogether.” Kyungsoo wanted to go back to his room. His head started hurting again. “Baekhyun came yesterday.” _Fucking traitor._  “He asked about you.”

“Can I go inside?” His mother sighed deeply. Kyungsoo knew she was not going to push him to talk. She never did. She didn’t need to. Kyungsoo always ran to her whenever he needed to.

“Just know that you can rely on me. About anything.” She ruffled his hair softly. “And please, try spending some time with Jongin. You might enjoy it more than you expect.” She winked cunningly and reached for her book.

Kyungsoo stared walking towards the house. _What did she mean?_

Maybe she’s right, Kyungsoo thought. But yet again, why bother for something that’ll never happen?

* * *

Kyungsoo seated himself down in front of the piano, fingers ghosting the keys. He wanted to play but for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to push them down.

It’s been an hour since he talked to his mother.

Jongin likes you.

Yeah, sure, Kyungsoo thought.

Jongin still hasn’t returned. There was that disturbing weight on his chest again. He couldn’t get rid of it.

The loneliness didn’t help too. He missed hanging out with his friends. It’s been a while since he talked with, well, any of them. It was their fault, they all fancied spending time with Jongin.

Jongin, who seemed to know about a lot of things.

Jongin, who liked- loved reading.

Jongin who liked taking photographs.

Jongin who danced gracefully.

And then there was Kyungsoo. Good at nothing. Definitely not good with people, that was for sure.

He wanted to bang his head into the wall.

He suddenly heard people yell in the garden. He recognized Baekhyun’s loud cries. Kyungsoo groaned, putting his head between his hands. He didn’t need this now.

He stood up to leave for his room, slowly walking out of the living room, heading for the stairs.

“Kyungsoo!” Baekhyun called his name. Shit, he saw Kyungsoo from the open door. “Come here!” He screamed, Chanyeol was standing next to Baekhyun, giving a lopsided smile.

Kyungsoo walked towards his friends, trying to hide the irritation he feels.

They formed a circle, Sooyoung and Joohyun standing in the middle. He spotted Jongin too, instantly turning his attention back to Baekhyun.

“What’s happening?” He asked trying to sound interested.

“We were scammed, my friend.” Bakehyun said dramatically, bringing his hand to his head. “They lied.” He wiped his non-existent tears.

“Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo used his stop annoying me, I’m already angry enough voice.

“Sooyoung and I are dating!” Kyungsoo heard Joohyun yell boisterously from where she stood. She had her arm around Sooyoung.

Kyungsoo couldn’t hide his genuine confusion. He looked at Sooyoung and then Joohyun and then Jongin. The latter smiled timidly.

“Can you believe it?” Baekhyun started talking again. “Apparently, Jongin and Sooyoung knew each other since they were kids.” He added, keeping his voice loud.

“Let them tell it, Baek.” Chanyeol snickered behind the smaller boy.

“It’s fine.” Sooyoung laughed softly. It didn’t sound as annoying as it did for a few weeks.

“Well,” Baekhyun turned to Chanyeol to sent a mischievious grin. “Jongin was helping Sooyoung all those times we were thinking, you know.” Baekhyun grinned wider now.

“Helping with what?” Kyungsoo turned to Jongin, raising an eyebrow.

“First of all, I was trying to calm her.” He laughed a little. “She was really excited. She thought you didn’t like her.” Jongin glanced at Joohyun. “You know, because you always glared.”

“I was glaring at you.” Joohyun blabbered, tightening her arm around Sooyoung.

“Why didn’t you ask for our help?” Chanyeol asked, his eyes are on Sooyoung. “I mean, I'm your brother and these morons are our friends. We could’ve helped.”

They could have. Was Sooyoung scared that they would make homophobic remarks? She didn’t need to think like that, they’ve known each other for years. No one here was like that. They would all stay for dinner when Marco and Matteo came. The husbands were the funniest people Kyungsoo knew.

Why didn’t Jongin tell him that he knew her? What they were actually up to? It could’ve been easier.

Kyungsoo knew he has no right to, but he felt betrayed. The funny thing was that it wasn’t Sooyoung that gave him that feeling. The girl he’s known for many years. It was Jongin. It was the tall, older boy who’s been around for what? A month? Not even that long.

Kyungsoo glanced at the tanned boy, trying to keep his expression blank.

Traitor, his mind yelled at Jongin.

Traitor, he made Kyungsoo think they could’ve been friends.

Traitor, he stole his friends and then didn’t even care for Kyungsoo.

Traitor, he sat down before him like nothing happened and dressed his wound.

Traitor.

“I’m happy for you.” Kyungsoo said in a dry tone, probably not looking happy. “I’m sorry, my head hurts.” He turned back on his heels and walked towards the house.

He didn’t know what to feel. Well, anger was there but he didn’t know whether he had the right to. Jongin never promised him anything. Jongin never told him that they were friends. Jongin didn't need to tell him anything.

But, fuck, he sure made him feel like that. All those fond looks, soft touches. They had to mean something, right?

Kyungsoo quickly climbed up the stairs and rushed to his room. He sat down on the unmade bed. His head did start to hurt. This was stupid. Why did he feel like this?

A few minutes later he heard steps inside the room. He didn’t bother taking his head out from between his hands, his eyes were still closed.

He felt gentle hands grab his. Slowly opening his eyes, he saw a beautiful, understanding smile.

“I wanted to make sure that you’re okay.” Jihyo squeezed his hands.

“I’m fine.” Kyungsoo let the girl sit down next to him, taking his hands in hers.

“You don’t seem fine.” She kept talking as Kyungsoo answered her with a shrug. “You didn’t get what I told you, did you?”

“Not really.” Kyungsoo’s voice came out silent. He did understand, he just didn’t want to tell her.

“Kyungsoo.” Jihyo grabbed his chin and made him look at her. “It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything. But don’t suffer because of it.”

“It’s not like I want to suffer. Life loves seeing me in pain.” Kyungsoo faked a laughter.

“Aren’t you supposed to be happy?” Jihyo looked around to make sure no one’s there. “I mean, he’s not involved with Sooyoung. You could have a chance-”

“Who says I want a chance?” Kyungsoo interrupted her, immediately regretting. She gave him one of those disappointed but not surprised looks that his mom gives.

“He seems interested.” Jihyo spoke after a few minutes.

“Yeah, interested in annoying me.” Kyungsoo snickered back.

“You kept your distance while we were around him.”

“Sorry for not drooling on him like the rest of you-”

“Stop interrupting me.” Jihyo pinched his arms. The girl was strong, that was for sure. “He always watched you- watches you. He sometimes asked about you but I think he kept some of those questions for Sooyoung. You know, he probably didn’t want us to find out that he likes you.”

“He doesn’t like me.”

“Are you stupid?” Jihyo deadpanned, but still not letting go of his hands.

“If he liked me why didn’t he ever try to talk to me?”

“Look, I don’t know. I just have a feeling-”

“I had feelings too Jihyo. For example I thought you liked me.”

“I did. I do.” Jihyo nearly whispered.

“What?” Kyungsoo couldn’t believe his ears. “You still-”

“Yeah.” Jihyo’s face turned as red as her dress.

“Then why are you trying to-”

“Because I want you to be happy.” Kyungsoo felt some other kind of weight on his chest now. It wasn’t that bad, like he felt with Jongin.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, squeezing Jihyo’s soft hands.

“It’s fine.”

Kyungsoo planted a small kiss on her hair. She laid her head on Kyungsoo’s shoulder. Kyungsoo wished that he could like her. Because here, feeling Jihyo’s head on his shoulder, smelling her hair, he felt more than fine.

Everything he concerned himself with, Jongin, his weakening friendships, his feelings. Everything left their place to peace. Kyungsoo wished that he could love Jihyo. That would be so much easier.

He heard a few steps from outside but glancing at the door, he saw no one.

Then Baekhyun entered.

“Oh sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt.” He grinned like an idiot.

“It’s fine.” Jihyo got up and Kyungsoo silently protested. “Everyone’s still in the garden?”

“Yeah, they’re planning what to do tonight.”

“Okay.” Jihyo glanced at Kyungsoo and tousled his hair. Kyungsoo would hate it, but it was somehow okay, when Jihyo did it. She walked out of the room.

“So.” Baekhyun walked around the bed and stopped in front of Kyungsoo, leaning his back down to Kyungsoo’s desk.

“What?” Kyungsoo asked, trying to keep his voice stable.

“You haven’t been around lately.” Baekhyun crossed his arms.

“I’m always here, you know it.” Actually, no. He wasn’t always home. He often left to see the cats, to stay alone. Sometimes he visited Daehyun. Sometimes Axel.

“You stopped hanging out with us.”

“You seemed happy with Jongin.”

“What?”

“Stop playing clueless.” Kyungsoo’s voice raised a little. “You know what, I don’t want to talk about it.” He laid down on the bed, he was definitely not sleepy. “Just go.”

“This is your problem.” Baekhyun straightened up. “You always keep it inside instead of talking.” He didn’t sound angry, mostly annoyed but Kyungsoo could feel the worry in his voice. “You’re going to explode Kyungsoo. And if you keep acting like this, no one will be there to collect your pieces.” With that, Baekhyun started to move.

Kyungsoo shouldn’t talk. Kyungsoo needed to learn how to control himself.

But yet again, he never has before.

“You left me alone!” He yelled at his friends, raising from the bed. “That idiot showed with all his glory and all of you left me for him!” His throat started to burn, his vision became blurry, but no. He wasn’t going to stop. He’s had enough.

“What are you talking about?” Baekhyun talked slowly, bewildered at Kyungsoo.

“Jongin!” Kyungsoo lifted himself up from his bed and stood before his friend. “You seemed very eager to stay at his side. Why are you blaming me now?”

“Don’t be stupid, he’s new and he doesn’t know anyone-”

“He knew Sooyoung! And he didn’t tell!”

“Yeah but they were-”

“I don’t care what they were doing! You’re my best friend and he took you from me! You let him!” Kyungsoo couldn’t breathe, his chest hurt.

“Stop talking nonsense Kyungsoo. It’s not like we pushed you away.” Baekhyun spoke. “You know I would never do that to you. If I knew you felt like this, I, I mean you never said anything, how was I supposed to-”

“I’m tired.” Kyungsoo walked back to his bed. “Please go.”

“No, I’m not-”

“Please.” Kyungsoo pleaded as he laid down on his bed once again. “I want to stay alone for a while.” Baekhyun stayed silent for a few minutes.

“I’ll come back. When you’re better.” Baekhyun whispered and walked out.

This was so stupid. Kyungsoo didn’t want to feel like this.

He fixed things with Jihyo but now he offended Baekhyun. He didn’t have the right to be offended, he wass the one who left Kyungsoo alone.

_He's not stealing anyone, you just stopped seeing them altogether._

_You kept your distance._

_You haven’t been around lately._

_You stopped hanging out with us._

These sentences went through his head. Maybe, just maybe, he was wrong.

He finally felt tears trace down his cheeks.

* * *

“Baby?” Kyungsoo hearda soft voice call out to him. He felt a hand run through his hair. He slowly opened his eyes. His mother looked at him, her eyes filled with sympathy. “You’ve been sleeping for a while.”

Kyungsoo couldn’t remember falling asleep. The fatigue of everything must have fallen on him.

He straightened up on the bed, a tear slowly fell down on his cheek. Was he crying while sleeping too?

His mother wiped away the single tears but her hand didn’t leave Kyungsoo’s skin. “You wanna go to the drive-in cinema?” She asked smiling.

“Aren’t you busy with your friends?” His voice was still raspy.

“No. They are busy with something else.” Again? Didn’t these people come to stay in their house? Why were they never here? “So?”

“Will we be late if I take a quick shower?” He was feeling like crap.

“Not if you’re extra quick.” His mother winked at him. Ruffling his hair softly, she got up and walked out of the room.

Kyungsoo rubbed his eyes. His whole body hurt but he wanted to spend time with his mother. It’s been a while since they did anything together.

* * *

Kyungsoo climbed down the stairs fast and stepped out of the house. His mother was already inside the car.

“Where’s everyone?” He inquired as he joined her in the vehicle.

“Well, like I said, the Kims are busy with something, your father is probably with Axel. And Jongin is with Sooyoung, I guess.” Of course. “Ah, did you hear it?” She exclaimed as she started the car. “About Sooyoung and Joohyun?”

“Yeah.” He replied simply, leaning his head on the car window.

“Honey, I don’t want to push you but-”

“Please don’t. I don’t want to talk about it.” He whispered as the car moved on the rocky road, hoping that his mother would understand.

“Okay.” His mother drove with one hand and the other held Kyungsoo’s. The boy was on the verge of crying again while his mother’s fingers rubbed circles around his skin.

The pale light from the moon shone on the river. Kyungsoo thought he should come see the cats again.

He didn't even feel hurt anymore. He just felt, _ _numb__. He wanted this stupid season to end so he could go back to Korea. Maybe he should ask his mother to spend the rest of the summer there. Minseok would happily accept him.

* * *

The drive-in wasn’t as crowded as it usually was. _It’s late,_  Kyungsoo thought. But he was glad, he wouldn’t have to face Jongin when they return home.

“What are they showing?” He asked his mother as they opened the roof of the convertible.

“Casablanca.”

“Finally, a good one.” They’ve been showing crappy movies lately. Most of the time, actually. His mother chuckled, getting back inside the car.

“Why haven’t we done anything together lately?” She asked, ruffling Kyungsoo’s hair.

“Well, apparently you love your friends more than you love your own son.” He pretended to wipe a tear, looking out of the window dramatically.

“Shut up.” They laughed together and Kyungsoo already felt better. At least for now.

The movie commenced after a while, the silence filled the open-air area. 

Kyungsoo was starting to feel sleepy as Ingrid Bergman's character requested the pianist to play As Time Goes By. One of Kyungsoo's favorites too. He tried to keep his eyes open as the man kept playing the soothing melody. Maybe he should try playing it too.

The man asked for the same song too, after the woman he loved left.

"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." The character said depressingly and somehow, Kyungsoo related.

 _ _Of all the people, it had to be Jongin.__  

“I’m going to call home.”

“What?” Kyungsoo snapped back from his thoughts and looked at his mother. Oh, they paused the movie for people to have a rest. 

“I’m going to call home to make sure everything’s okay.”

“Okay.” Kyungsoo yawned wide after his mother left. This was one of his favorite movies, he’d watch it a hundred time. So why couldn’t he focus? He accepted his mother's offer to get away from his thought but he's got more in his head now.

The car door opened after a while but it wasn’t his mother who stepped in.

“Hey.”

 _ _Jongin.__  

“What are you doing here?” Kyungsoo asked tiredly.

“I ran into your mom. She said she needs to go home.” Jongin replied in a flat tone.

“Then why didn’t she come get the car?”

“She said you’d like to keep watching the movie-”

“Where is she? We’ll get her. I don’t want to-”

“Kyungsoo.” He glanced at Jongin. There was an agonizing look on his face. "Let's just enjoy the movie, okay? It's one of my favorites." He stated leaning back on the driver seat.

Kyungsoo leaned back too and fixed his eyes forward. He never wanted this movie to start so bad. To his luck, it did.

From time to time, he could feel Jongin’s eyes on him, but he forced himself to keep his eyes on the screen. Nothing has ever been this hard. He wanted to talk to Jongin. He wanted to ask him why didn’t he tell him about Sooyoung. He wanted to ask why he ignored him if there was nothing between him and Sooyoung. But yet again, he knew that he had no right to. That was the biggest problem he had: he had no right in anything that was about Jongin.

He felt his eyelids get heavier with every second passing. He shouldn’t have left the bed. His head fell a few times but he resisted to sleep. Not for long though.

He sensed a soft hand on his cheek and then his head rested on something softer. He couldn’t open his eyes this time, letting the sleep take over his body.

* * *

Kyungsoo felt wabbling. He heard an engine. But they stopped suddenly. He slowly cracked his eyes open. It was dark but he wasn’t on his bed. Right, he was in his mother’s car. They went to see a movie but then Jongin came.

Kyungsoo felt a hand run through his hair, in between his dark locks. He’s leaned on someone’s body. He raised his head. His sleepy eyes met Jongin’s lively ones. The latter was smiling at him with the same fondness he had when they were in the bookstore.

“You fell asleep.” Jongin explained before Kyungsoo could talk. He didn’t anyway, he just nodded and immediately stepped out of the car. He couldn’t take it, not right now.

“Thank you.” He turned to Jongin before walking inside the house.

“It’s fine.” Jongin’s expression faltered a little, but he still managed a smile.

Kyungsoo wished that he could make the latter smile more often, but not like this. A genuine smile. A smile where his eyes turn into cresdents and a small dimple forms under his left cheek.

Sighing in defeat, he walked to his room. He could never have Jongin the way he wanted to, could he?

He grabbed a pillow and a blanket and moved to his mother’s office. He couldn’t stay with Jongin. Not tonight.

* * *

Kyungsoo woke up drenched in sweat. His head hurt like hell. Did he have nightmare? He didn't remember.

He stood up from the ground of the small room. Right, he slept in his mother's office. He’s stiffened even worse, sleeping curled between the worktable and the chairs.

He stretched his limps and walked over to the window. He spotted his mother and Minhee prepare breakfast in their usual cheeriness.

He just woke up but weirdly, he didn't feel hungry. 

Kyungsoo inhaled deeply and moved away from the window. He took the thin blanket from the floor and folded it. Grabbing the pillow too, he headed for his room.

 _ _Please do not be in the room. Please do not be in the room.__  

Luckily, Jongin really wasn't in the room. Sighing in relief, he put down the blanket and the pillow on his bed and headed to the bathroom.

After cleaning himself and putting on dry clothes, Kyungsoo stepped down on the stairs. He took a look out of the door and saw everyone out in the garden, seated around the table.

He didn't want to sit there and pretend like nothing happened. He was sad and tired. The weight on his chest still lingered there, even more bothersome now. He didn't want to see Jongin. But he had to.

He nearly crashed into his mother while trying to walk out the door.

"Morning, Soo. I was just about to wake you up." She seemed even more joyful than usual. Did something happen? "Let's go, the table's ready-"

"I'm not hungry." Kyungsoo rushed.

"But you just-"

"Is it okay if I skip?" He looked at his mother beggingly and hoped that she'll understand. She looked back at the garden and released a deep sigh.

"At least let me prepare a sandwich."

"It's fine, I really don't feel like eating."

"Kyungsoo-"

"I need to talk with Baekhyun. I'll eat something afterwards, okay?"

"Okay." She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and squeezed him into a tight hug as if she wanted to let him know that he was secure in his mother’s arms and Kyungsoo appreciated it. He needed it. She planted a kiss on Kyungsoo's still damp hair before letting him go and walking into the kitchen.

Kyungsoo left the house from the kitchen door in order to not run into the table full of people. His mother would explain them.

He felt bad though, he lied to his mother. He was not going to talk with Baekhyun. He wanted to, god knows he did. But he fought with the latter for nothing and he didn’t have the guts to face him.

Instead, he walked towards the woods to see the cats. His hand was better now, only a lengthy scratch was left behind. Also, he didn't want to forget about the little one again.

Kyungsoo wished that he could bring along Jihyo to see the cats too. She'd probably like that but it was still early and he didn't want to bother her. He caused her enough trouble.

He walked all the way to the riverside. The weather was back being sultry after the thunderstorm. He thought the sun wouldn’t show its face much or at least it would be a little cooler but what Kyungsoo wanted never seemed to happen anyway.

He looked around the riverside and couldn't see the little monsters. The pocket of cat food he left the last time was still there but it was nearly empty. He should buy another one sometime.

He sat on the grass, he didn’t want to go back yet. He’ll wait for the cats to appear, at least the little one since he’s always been around here.

I should give them names, he thought to himself. Calling them cats, animals, monsters weren't really good choices.

"Hey." He heard a husky voice speak behind him.

Baekhyun dumped his bike on the roadside and started walking towards him. He seemed sleepy and tired. "I was buying bread." He explained as he sat down next to Kyungsoo.

They at down for a few seconds, not saying anything. Kyungsoo found it rather relaxing. Lately, he rathered the silence. Speaking didn’t really do anything good for him anyway.

"I'm sorry." Baekhyun’s the one to break the silence timidly. Kyungsoo looked up and met Baekhyun's eyes.

"Why are you sorry? I was being a dick for no reason." Kyungsoo whispered softly, averting his gaze after realizing the dark circles under his friend’s eyes.

Baekhyun might pretend to be this tough, outgoing guy but he’s the most delicate person Kyungsoo has known. Kyungsoo cursed himself mentally, thinking - knowing that he caused his friend stress.

"There's a reason." Baekhyun sounded firm and demanding. Kyungsoo wanted to talk to him but he couldn’t find the right words. He didn't want to fight with Baekhyun again.

"There's a reason, but it's not you." He whispered, folding his hands together. __It's someone who drives me crazy.__

"Kyungsoo." Baekhyun's hands found his fisted ones and squeezed them tight. "You know you can talk to me, right?" Kyungsoo looked up to him again. He saw the sincerity in Baekhyun’s softened expression. He saw the love his friend has for him.

Kyungsoo didn't know how his face got all wet, he didn’t know how he started shaking violently.

He felt Baekhyun's arms wrap around him as he whimpered his feelings out. He felt vulnerable. He felt trapped. Kyungsoo just wanted everything back as they were before.

But right there, in his best friend's arms, he also felt secure just like he did with his mom.

It felt good to let everything out he's been holding in for weeks.

Baekhyun didn't say anything. He just sat there and held Kyungsoo tight as the latter released deep sighs alongside his tears.

"I think I like Jongin." Kyungsoo stated after he's calmed down. Baekhyun still held him, stroking his hair.

"I know."

"What?" Kyungsoo lifted his head from Baekhyun's chest and found the latter smirking at him.

"I've known you my entire life. You think I wouldn't notice?" He spoke softly, raising an eyebrow. "You thought pretending to hate him would hide your feelings?"

 ”I thought it would make my feelings disappear." Kyungsoo mumbleb, wiping away the sogginess of his face.

"Why do you want them to disappear?" Baekhyun seemed genuinely confused. "I mean, they're not together. Jongin and Sooyoung. You have a chance-"

"He hates me." Kyungsoo replied bitterly.  

"Oh. You don't know it, do you?" Baekhyun asked. There was a playful expression on his face. His sleepiness seemed to be gone.

"Know what?"

"It's not my place to tell you." Baekhyun answered cockily and got up from the grass. "Have you eaten? My mom made pancakes." Kyungsoo’s stomach growled with the mention of pancakes and he glanced at his friend with a pout on his lips. Baekhyun laughed boistrously.

“I didn’t have breakfast, shut up!” Kyungsoo pushed his friend a little but Baekhyun didn’t stop laughing.

Kyungsoo already started to feel lighter. He missed this.

* * *

Kyungsoo returned home his stomach full and his heart lighter. Talking with someone was probably all he needed.

He was feeling better now that Baekhyun knew. They never hide anything from each other and this distance between them has been bugging him even before he snapped at his friend.

He felt even better that his fears didn’t come true. He was so scared that Baekhyun would never speak to him again.

 _ _Are you stupid?__  Baekhyun told him as they filled their mouths with pancakes, __you’d really think I would stop being friends with you because of a fight?__

Baekhyun kind of insulted him but Kyungsoo didn’t mind.

And now he was back home and had to face Jongin. He hasn’t seen the latter since last night.

The house was empty again. Honestly, if they were never going to spend time here, what was the meaning of coming here?

He walked up to his room, trying to prepare himself for bity remarks from Jongin. He expected him to joke about the other day, how he fell asleep on Jongin’s shoulder.

Inhaling deeply, he entered his room. It was empty. Maybe Jongin left with his parents.

 The moment Kyungsoo relieved, the bathroom door opened and Jongin showed up.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

Kyungsoo moved to his desk to search for his wallet, he could excuse himself to buy cat food and-

“I need to go to town.” Jongin sat down on the bed.

“And?”

“Come with me.” Kyungsoo glanced at the older one. Jongin sounded timid but his expression seemed determined.

“Why do you want to go?” He avereds his gaze and kept looking for his wallet.

“I need to buy a book.”

“I thought you already figured your way to the town.” Kyungsoo hardly stabled his voice. “Weren’t you out all the time with Sooyoung?”

“I didn’t know you paid attention to my actions.” He could feel the cockiness through Jongin’s voice. “Come with me.” He wasn’t even sorry for lying about Sooyoung, how they decieved everyone. Kyungsoo felt all the calmness he felt wash away.

“Take someone else.”

“I want you.” It came out nearly as a whisper but the sentence was clear. Kyungsoo succeeded not falling down on the floor, trying to take a deep breath.

It was a simple sentence. It didn’t mean what he wished it did. But god, how it affected him. How Jongin affected him.

“Fine.” He tried to sound casual. “I need to buy a few things too anyway.” Cats. Right.

* * *

They walked out of the house late afternoon, in order to avoid the heat. Jongin moved before Kyungsoo. His palm was open, relaxed. Kyungsoo wished that he can just slip his hand inside Jongin’s.

“Going somewhere?” They both turned the owner of the voice at the same time.

Eliott stood under the sun. His blond hair shone with the rays of light. Kyungsoo couldn’t say the same about his naked torso though. His pale skin was red all over and it made him look sick.

Jongin didn’t look like that under the sun. He looked beautiful. His skin shone and made his muscles seem even sharper-

“Yeah, actually.” Jongin answered Eliott with a cute accent. Kyungsoo never heard him speak English before, since they never really needed it. Now that Kyungsoo remembered, did Jongin get anything from their exchanges with Axel when they pulled out that statue?

“I was talking to Soo.” Eliott raised an eyebrow as he answered cockily.

“We’re kind of busy.” Kyungsoo wanted to keep it short. “Does your father need something?”

“No, um, I wanted to,” Eliott stuttered. __He’s cute,__  Kyungsoo thought. “There’s a small gathering tonight. For that statue, you remember?” Kyungsoo nodded for the other to continue. “Well, it’s apparently very old and important. Dad wanted to celebrate.”

“Okay, I’ll tell my parents.” Kyungsoo gestured Jongin to walk but he halted as Eliott keeps talking.

“I thought, maybe you could come too?” He smiled. And Kyungsoo realized something. This boy, this gorgeous boy was asking Kyungsoo out.

That’s why he’s been touchy. He probabyly wanted to ask Kyungsoo out before but his father interrupted him.

“I don’t know.” Kyungsoo simply replied. He did know, actually. He’s not going to go. He might be gorgeous but still, he didn’t make Kyungsoo feel anything besides admiration for his looks.

When Kyungsoo looked at Eliott, he didn’t feel like his heart was about to explode. __Like a certain someone else.__

Kyungsoo shooted him an apologetical look and started walking. Jongin followed him.

“You know English?” Kyungsoo asked Jongin timidly.

“A little. I’m not very good at speaking though.” __I’ll help you,__  Kyungsoo wanted to say, but he kept his mouth shut. He has already made a clown of himself in front of Jongin many times. He was determined to not do it again.

* * *

“So, what do you want to get? I’ll ask Daehyun, he’ll find it faster.” Kyungsoo leaned down on the door frame of the shop.

“You want to get rid of me that fast?” A small pout was formed on the Jongin’s lips. Kyungsoo didn’t answer because if he opened his mouth, he wass going to scream. Why did he have to be so cute? “I don’t know actually. I just wanted to spend some time with you.” Jongin kept talking and Kyungsoo’s heart missed a beat.

Spending time together? After all that stupid quarrels? Why?

“De Profundis.”

“What?”

“De Profundis. Oscar Wilde.” Kyungsoo coughed a little to straighten his tone. “You should take that if you haven’t read it. It’s one of my favorites.” He pointed at a higher shelf. Jongin didn’t waste anytime and grabbed the old book.

He smiled at Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo felt heat surrounding his skin.

“What do you need?”

“Huh?”

“You said you also need to buy stuff?” Jongin asked, pulling out some money for the book. “Or did you lie so you could come with me?” He smirked cunningly.

“I didn’t need to lie to come with you, you asked me to.” Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow. “Also, I do need to buy stuff.”

“What stuff?”

“You’re very inquisitive today, aren’t you?” Jongin’s smile faltered at Kyunsgoo’s words.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother-”

“I’m joking. Remember that big cat? I’ll buy food for them.” He laughed a little, exiting the shop.

“Oh, okay.” Jongin’s smile was back on his lips and Kyungsoo thought Jongin was the most beautiful man he’s ever seen.

“Let’s go.” Kyungsoo broke the eye connection. He felt his legs get weaker evertime Jongin's plush lips stretched into a smile

* * *

“There you go monsters.”

They didn’t only buy food buy also two different trays to put it in so the cats wouldn’t fight again. They seemed okay now.

 _ _“It was a big cat.”__  He heard Jongin snicker behind him. “I can’t believe that small thing injured you.”

“Shut up.” Jongin laughed loudly at that.

“Follow me.” Kyungsoo gestured to Jongin as he started to walk into the woods.

“Kyungsoo!” He heard Jongin call out to him. The latter was actually following him. Kyungsoo sensed that weight back on his chest but it wasn’t bothersome, not for now at least.

“This is my spot.” He started talking when reached to the small lake. “All mine. I come here to read. I can’t begin to tell you the number of books I’ve read here.”

Jongin stepped inside the water after putting his book on somewhere dry. Kyungsoo laughed as he heard the latter shriek.

“It’s freezing!”

“The spring is in the mountains. The water comes straight down from there.”  Kyungsoo told him, pointing at the hills far away.

Jongin looked up to him, slowly smiling at Kyungsoo’s direction. Kyungsoo mirrored his actions. He was not going to back down or glance away anymore. He’s been playing that game for a long time.

This time, it was Jongin who looked away the first.

* * *

“I love this.” Kyungsoo spoke first, his eyes were closed, listening the water splash.

They left the spring after washing their faces and drinking some water. The cats seemed to be asleep after filling their stomachs.

“What?” Jongin asked as he laid next to Kyungsoo on the grass, his eyes were closed too.

Kyungsoo waited a few seconds before answering. “Everything.”

“What about us?” Jongin inquired so casually while Kyungsoo felt a rush fill his veins. He couln’t screw this up. __He__ _ _wa__ _ _s not going to screw this up.__

It might not be the way Kyungsoo wanted it, but at least they were talking now.

“I would, if we were always like this.” Kyungsoo joked but Jongin stayed silent for a minute.

“We could, if you weren’t such a dummy.” Kyungsoo’s eyes fluttered open at Jongin’s words and he turned his gaze towards him.

“Excuse you?”

“It’s unbelievable, how oblivious you are.” Jongin carcked his eyes too, he’s smirking as always. Kyungsoo wanted to rip it off of his face. Or kiss it away. He was not sure.

“Oblivious to what?” Kyungsoo snickered. “Also, you were always with Sooyoung. What were you expecting?” Jongin laughed, closing his eyes once again. “What was that about anyway?” Kyungsoo kept talking.

“What do you mean?”

“Why were you always with her?” Now that he knew that the girl was in love with Joohyun, he was genuinely curious.

“We already explained, I was helping her.” Jongin answered casually.

“Yeah, but why didn’t you guys ask for our help?”

“She asked for my help and she chose not to tell you guys. Ask her.” Jongin replied nonchalantly.

Okay, __ouch?__  Kyungsoo has never been that close with Sooyoung and he didn’t really care but why was Jongin being hostile about it?

Kyungsoo decided to not to talk anymore, they barely got any peace, he wasn’t going to be the one to screw it again.

“Let’s go back.” Kyungsoo said after a while. He needed to tell his father about that gathering and he was tired.

They started walking slowly back to the house. Jongin followed Kyungsoo from behind. Kyungsoo wished that he could just turn around and see the latter’s face. He contained the urge.

* * *

They walked back home in silence, watching the setting sun. Kyungsoo wanted to say something but he didn’t know what to say. 

They talked but Jongin didn’t explain much. Kyungsoo made a few things obvious, at least he thought he did. But nothing happened. Jongin didn't act on anything. Maybe it wasn’t supposed to happen. Maybe Kyungsoo's feelings are supposed to stay unrequited.

Still, it didn't help him get rid of the weight on his chest that kept bothering him. It was lighter, but it was still there.

Their parents weren't home. Minhee didn't seem around too.

"Did they tell you anything?" Kyungsoo glanced at Jongin. The latter was seated on Kyungsoo's chair in the garden.

"No. They seemed to be awfully busy in the town but they never tell me anything." Jongin laid his arms on the table and rested his head on his arms.

"Okay." Kyungsoo looked away. One thing he had noticed about the older, was that Jongin has a strong, piercing stare. It wasn’t anything bad, but it was overwhelming.

Instead, Kyungsoo looked up at the sky. It was clear, he could see the stars. __That's what made me fall in love with this town,__  his father said once, __the nature.__

Kyungsoo smiled at the fond memory.

"Come with me." Jongin spoke softly, standing next to Kyungsoo. He didn't even notice Jongin move.

Before he could say anything, Jongin grabbed his hand gently and led him into the house. They climbed the stairs. Kyungsoo didn't force it too much but tried to retrieve his hand. Jongin didn't let him. They ended up their pinkies linked as Jongin led him pass his room.

"Where are we going?" The library? Were they going go read? Really?

"To the attict."

"What? Are you going to murder me?" Kyungsoo mocked the latter and immediately regretted it. Jongin turned his eyes to Kyungsoo, giving him a lascivious look. Kyungsoo gulped as they climbed the stairs to the attict.

"Here." Jongin pointed at what seemed to be a window. "Hold on." Jongin opened the window and got out. Kyungsoo glanced at the taller one as he stretched his arms towards Kyungsoo. "I'll pull you."

"Are you joking?"

“No?" But he was smirking. __Asshole.__

"My father used to carry me like that."

"You can call me daddy if you want." Kyungsoo punched Jongin's arm with that remark but that was a mistake. Jongin grabbed his arm and pulled him up to outside.

Right. The roof. "I used to get up here with my father too." He mumbled as Jongin pulled him to his side.  

"Well, like I said before-"

"Don't say it." Kyungsoo threatened the latter.

With a soft chuckle Jongin led them to sit on a blacket outspread on the floor of the roof.

"I come here every night ever since we arrived."

"Oh so you're not sleeping in my bed at nights and still let me die on the floor." Kyungsoo deadpanned at the other who was laughing softly.

"I offered you the bed. You didn't want it." Jongin shrugged a little. "I guess I should've offered sleeping togerher earlier."

How did he say stuff like that so easily? Why did he never need any struggle to get Kyungsoo all hot and bothered? Kyungsoo hoped that under the moonlight his warm cheeks didn't show their redness.

"I really like it here." Jongin said laying down on the blanket while Kyungsoo was still sitting up. He was scared to fall. His father would always hold him in his arms and never let Kyungsoo get scared. "You okay?" Jongin asked as if he was reading Kyungsoo's mind.

"I haven't been up here since I was a kid. It's, well-"

"Are you afraid of heights?" Jongin asked again, he was sincerely worried, Kyungsoo could feel it through his voice. "Come here."

Jongin slowly tugged at his arms and pulled him down on his chest. He wrapped an arm around the smaller boy as Kyungsoo froze in place. "We're even now."

Kyungsoo smiled at the remark. Jongin slept on Kyungsoo's chest. __I guess it's my turn now,__  Kyungsoo thought.

“I thought you'd punch me." Jongin talked again with a silent chuckle.

“Why?”

“I told you before. I know you don’t like me.” Jongin nearly whispered.

 _ _Tell him,__  that small voice on the back on Kyungsoo’s head urged him, __tell him what you feel.__

“I thought things would get better between us when you finally know that there’s nothing between me and Sooyoung.” Jongin continued as his hand caressed Kyungsoo’s upper arm.

“They didn’t?”

“Well, you don’t glare at me anymore so I guess that’s win.” Jongin giggled. “But still, things aren’t the way I wanted them to be.”

Kyungsoo felt a shudder run down his spine. __What is he trying to say? How did he expect they would be?__

“Is there something you want to tell me?” Kyungsoo encouraged the latter. He felt like he couldn’t talk to him if he didn’t feel assured. He was already insecure enough, he couldn’t handle rejection at this point and-

“I like you.” Jongin spoke confidently.

Kyungsoo choked on air as Jongin moved his hand on Kyungsoo’s hair and stroked it softly. Kyungsoo wanted to say something, he wanted to tell him that he feels the same but he couldn’t. It was like there was a lump in his throat and didn’t let him speak.

“I got my eyes on you ever since the first time I saw you.” Jongin kept speaking. “Well, maybe not the first time. But you didn’t seem to care. You looked at me and all I saw was annoyance. I don’t know why but it hurt me. We barely knew each other but still, your opinion mattered. It was like, there was a connection between us but I was the only one feeling it. I wanted you to like me, or even more. I don’t know.” He chuckled slowly.

Kyungsoo felt like crying. He wanted this for so long and now, he couldn’t even talk.

“I’m sorry, that was a lot.” Jongin whispered after a few minutes. “I still don’t expect you to feel the same-”

“I do.” Kyungsoo coughed away the huskiness in his voice. “I did.”

“Really? You made it very obvious.” Jongin mocked, earning himself a punch on the stomach.

“Let me finish.”

“Sorry.”

“I thought things would be better after I took you to Daehyun’s but then Sooyoung happened.”

“I already told you-”

“I know, just let me talk.” Kyungsoo said solicitously. “I didn’t know why you were always beside her. You should’ve told me.”

“I didn’t know you and I’ve known Sooyoung for so long. She wanted it to be a secret. I wanted respect my friend.”

“Makes sense. Still. I thought you liked her. Everyone liked you. I felt like I was losing my friends, they were always around you and it bothered me. They all got to spend time with you and all I could was watch you from distance.”

“You could’ve joined us instead of going around with that girl.” Jongin tensed as he spoke.

“Jihyo?” Kyungsoo laughed loudly. “She’s the one who helped me accept my feeling for you, actually."

“What?” Jongin sounded bemused.

“I wanted to hate you. I wanted to ignore my feelings, hoping that they would go away.” Kyungsoo inhaled deeply. “They didn’t. She made sure that I was okay, that’s all.”

“Maybe I should thank her.” Jongin’s hold tightened around Kyungsoo as the smaller nuzzled closer into his chest. “What about after?” He asked resting his chin on Kyungsoo’s head.

“After what?”

“After finding out about Sooyoung and Joohyun?”

“I was upset because you lied.” Kyungsoo whispered slowly. He knew he had no business to feel like that. Jongin never guaranteed him anything. “Also like I said, I thought you were stealing my friends. I even had a fight with Baekhyun about it.” Kyungsoo cringed at the memory, at his stupidness.

“Funny. It was you I wanted to steal.” Jongin’s arms loosened around Kyungsoo. He pulled away so he could face the younger. “I was annoyed because you were always talking with that Baekhyun guy, not that I had any right. I know he’s been your friend for long. And Jihyo, of course-”

“Yeah but-”

“I didn’t know, just like you didn’t know about Sooyoung.” Jongin interrupted. “That night, when we went out. I saw you sneak away with her, holding her hand. I felt like someone was stepping on my chest.” His eyes were filled with sincerity.

“I felt like that a lot too.” Kyungsoo whispered back.

“We’re idiots, aren’t we?” Jongin smiled a little, Kyungsoo mirroring his action.

Jongin brought his other hand to Kyungsoo’s cheek and caressed slowly as Kyungsoo leaned down to the touch, closing his eyes.

“Kyungsoo.”

“Huh?”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes, please.” Kyungsoo breathed out, his eyes still closed.

He felt warm breath ghosting his lips as Jongin’s hand moved to his nape. Then he felt it. Soft, warm lips touching his.

It was barely touch of lips the first time but Kyungsoo felt like volcanos were erupting in him. He forgot how to breathe.

Jongin pulled away, their foreheads still touching.

This wasn’t enough, Kyungsoo wanted more. He leaned down for another kiss, an actual kiss. Gentle, yet passionate. More demanding this time.

Jongin’s hand travelled down to Kyungsoo’s waist, touching the exposed skin as he lifted up his button up. Kyungsoo gasped into the kiss, feeling Jongin’s warm tongue touching his.

Jongin kissed him lasciviously and Kyungsoo felt the world fade away.

He wanted this for so long and now, he felt like he’s about to break.

They pulld away at the same time, gasping for air. Kyungsoo looked up to Jongin, he was flushed and his swollen lips shone with wetness.

“Can we take this somewhere softer?” Jongin asked, still breathing fast. “I don’t want to break my back here.”

Kyungsoo laughed as straightened up. He’s never been the one to let his guard down, but with Jongin, he felt _ _safe.__

He still didn’t understand how did his feelings get so intense so quick, but he was ready to face them now. Especially when he’s wrapped in Jongin’s arms, being kissed gently and passionately as the taller one laid him down on the bed after locking the bedroom door.

It seemed like it’s going to be a long night, but he wass ready. Actually, he wished that the night could get longer as Jongin trailed down a path of kisses on his now naked skin.

For the first time in weeks, Kyungsoo felt happy. He felt blissful as Jongin hovered above him and prepared him for what to come.

* * *

Kyungsoo woke up to a breeze caressing his naked skin. The curtain danced around the open window.

He stretched a hand to next to him but all he could feel was the wrinkled sheet. Jongin wasn't there.

Kyungsoo straightened up a little, a sweet ache running down his spine.

 _ _There's nothing gentle about a horny Jongin,__  he recalled. Where was the latter anyway?

Kyungsoo stood up from the bed slowly and walked towards bathroom after grabbing clean clothes. He took a look at himself in the mirror.

Jongin avoided marking his neck since Kyungsoo didn't want to be mocked by his friends but the rest of his body was covered in reddish marks. Kyungsoo smiled cunningly remembering how every mark was created. He was glad that his parents or Jongin's parents didn't show up the other night. He didn't think he could keep silent as Jongin's tongue wandered around his body.

Taking a quick shower and changing the sheets, he headed for he living room. There were voices coming over from there, were they going to have breakfast inside today?

"We should leave soon to arrange everything." He heard Mr. Kim talk slowly. Jongin was sitting across him, his head bowed forward. He didn't seem happy. Kyungsoo wanted to ask what's wrong but the adults kept talking.

"Can't we stay a little longer?" Mrs. Kim asked her husband, caressing Jongin's hair.

"You already readied the house, you should stay." Kyungsoo’s mom joined the other woman.

"We need to take care of a few things back at home."

"Why do I have to go back early too?" Jongin said annoyedly.

Wait, what? Going back? Are they going back home?

"Jongin can stay if he wants." Kyungsoo's mother suggested. "We're more than happy to have him longer."

"We already overstayed our welcome."

"Nonsense." Kyungsoo's father talked this time.

What were they talking about? Were they really leaving? Kyungsoo felt dizzy. They just made up and Jongin had to leave? 

"Baby, good morning." Kyungsoo shooted a look at his mother, hearing the nickname.

"Hey." He mumbled trying to fake a smile. Then he turned his gaze towards Jongin. The latter seemed gloomy. He sent Kyungsoo an apologetic look but Kyungsoo averted his gaze. "I need to see Baekhyun." He walked out of the house, not even waiting an answer.

* * *

“How big is it?” Baekhyun asked one more time and earned  another punch on the arm.

“Focus on what’s important!”

“I am! Your man’s dick!”

“This was a mistake.” Kyungsoo grumbled and tried to get up from Baekhyun’s bed.

“Okay, okay! Sorry!” Baekhyun held his arm and led him back to his seat. “So, he’s leaving?”

“I don’t know, he doesn’t know either I suppose. My mom said he could stay if he wants.” Kyungsoo really hoped he could. Maybe he could talk to the Kims himself.

“But he’ll come back, right? I mean they really seemed to enjoy here." Baekhyun reminded Kyungsoo, holding out a popsicle he took out from the mini fridge.

“Yeah, but the next summer is a long way off.” Kyungsoo mumbled laying down on the bed.

“Yeah but still, at least now you know that he likes you. And that boy impressive. Confessing under the stars? So fucking cliché yet so cute. I give permission.”

“No one asked for your permission.”

“Yeah, you already fucked him.” Kyungsoo choked on the ice as Baekhyun ran away from the bed to avoid getting hit again.

He nearly crushed with his mother at the bedroom door. "Please stop acting like a child." Baekhyun's mother deadpanned at her son. "Kyungsoo, dear, someone wants to see you."

"He's a dear but I'm a child?" Baekhyun asked dramatically as he walked back to the bed.

"Yes." His mother walked out of the room and Kyungsoo grinned at his friend as he lifted off from the bed to see who was waiting for him.

Walking out to the garden, he saw it's Jongin. His lips were pursed into a line, he seemed angry. Kyungsoo has never seen him like this before.

"You didn't even bother to ask anything." He started talking. "Not even after last night."

"Are you going to leave?"

“I don’t know.” Jongin breathed out, stepping towards the bench next to the huge tree. Kyungsoo watched him silently. “Are you going to listen or walk away?” Jongin asked, he’s irritated, Kyungsoo could feel it.

Kyungsoo shooted a glance towards the house’s door to make sure no one was there. He started walking towards Jongin and sat down next to him.

“They bought a house here.”

“What?”

“A beach house, actually. Near that one where we visited your father’s friend, Axel.” Jongin kept talking. “We’ll be here too, every summer.”

“That’s, um, good?” Kyungsoo mumbleb, trying really hard to not seem too enthusiastic.

“Good? Really?” Jongin raised an eyebrow and Kyungsoo chuckled a little. “Still, my parents want to go home earlier. I think they had a problem with the bank and they can’t solve it from here.”

“Can’t you stay?” Kyungsoo asked impatiently. “My mom said that it’s okay-”

“You heard them. I don’t think they’ll let me.” Jongin’s voice came out as a whisper.

The rest of the summer was supposed to be better, now that they made up. But apparently the all gods that has ever existed hate Kyungsoo. He never gets what he wants.

“Look at the bright side.” Jongin held Kyungsoo’s hand. “I’ll bother you every summer.”

Kyungsoo smiled softly as he wrapped his arms around Jongin.

"I hate to interrupt the moment," Kyungsoo heard Baekhyun speak from the entrance. "But Kyungsoo's mother is calling."

Kyungsoo got up slowly and walked inside. 

"Hey."

"Come home, bring Jongin with you too. I suppose he's with you?" His mother asked in her usual joyful spirit.

"Yeah. Something happened?"

"Nothing bad, baby. Just come here okay?"

"Okay."

Kyungsoo hung up and walked out to the garden hastily. It was not a good idea to leave Baekhyun alone with Jongin.

"-I may be small but I have enough power to break your bones, Mister." Kyungsoo heard Baekhyun say while Jongin wa staring at him in bewilderment.

"What's happening?" He shoots a glance towards Baekhyun.

"Nothing, just talking with Nini." Baekhyun replied with a smirk.

"Nini?" Kyungsoo gazed at Jongin with raised eye brows.

"That's what my parents call me." Jongin answered bashfully. " _ _Only__  my parents." He sent a glare to Baekhyun's way.

"Mom wants us back at home." Kyungsoo statesd with a loud chuckle. "Thank your mom for the cake for me!" He yelled back at Baekhyun as they moved away from the latter.

They hit the road to home, hands linked together.

* * *

“Hey, what’s going on?” Kyungsoo asked his father as they entered the house, tripping on some baggages placed next to the door.

“Our friends are leaving.” His father answered him as he slowly pushed down the ivories. "Jongin, I think you should talk to your parents. They're upstairs."

Jongin started climbing up the steps after sending a tired smile to Kyungsoo. 

Well, he could say goodbye to the rest of his time with Jongin. He was going to have to wait for months before he could see him again. What if he finds someone else back at home? What if he likes that someone else more than he likes Kyungsoo and decides to-

“Are you okay, son?” His father interrupted his thoughts, he was wearing a worried expression.

“Yeah. I just, um-”

“Come here.” His father gestured the sofa. Kyungsoo sst down and waited for his father. The man was grabbing a glass of wine. “Jongin and you,” His father started, “You didn’t really have a good friendship, did you?” He asked raising an eyebrow.

Kyungsoo shook his head no. __Mostly because of my stupidity,__  he wanted to say but he stayed silent.

“You seemed worried this morning, hearing that he might have to leave.”

“We’re not, um, we’re friends now.”

“Friends?” His father chuckled a little. Taking a sip from his wine, he turned to face his son again. “I meant it when I said you can talk to us about anything.” He started stroking Kyungsoo’s hair and all Kyungsoo could do was send his father a greatful look. “It doesn’t matter if it’s a friendship or something more. I want you to be happy.”

“I’m happy.”

“You haven’t been for a while. I’m a good observer.” His father whispered back. “You’re capable of making your own decisions, I trust you with that. Jongin is a good kid.” He finished his wine in one go. “Don’t waste your feelings, okay?”

Kyungsoo nodded, trying to hold back his tears. 

"Go upstairs. You might be happy after all." His father winked and walked towards the piano.

Kyungsoo climbed the stairs with a lighter heart.

He opened the door slowly and found Jongin laying on his bed. The latter immediately smiled wide as Kyungsoo entered the room.

“Hey.” Kyungsoo greeted him before he tumbled into bed to embrace Jongin.

“You’re clingy when you’re nice.” Jongin said in a mocking tone. “I like that.”

Jongin wrapped his arms around Kyungsoo and pulled him into his chest like the other night, when they were under the stars.

“I guess I should stick to you as much as possible before you go.” Kyungsoo tried to say it in a nonchalant way but he ended up sounding whiney.

“You’ll be sad when I leave?” Jongin whispered as his thump moves down on Kyungsoo’s spine.

“Yeah? I thought I already said that I like you?”

Jongin turned on his side swiftly and didn’t waste any time connecting their lips. It was not as passionate as the one they had yesterday. It wass gentle, soothing. Jongin moved lazily against Kyungsoo’s lips.

“I like you too.” He said once they break the kiss. “And I’m not leaving. Well, not at least for another two weeks.”

“What?”

“My parents agreed to your mom. I’m staying longer.” Jongin whispered pecking Kyungsoo on his already swollen lips.

“Why didn’t you tell me when I walked in?” Kyungsoo almost bellowed at the latter, straighting up on his bed.

“How could I hear you telling me that you like me if I told you right away.”

“Asshole.” Kyungsoo took out a pillow and started hitting Jongin with it. Well he tried. The other one grabbed his arms and pulled him into his chest again. __God, he smell__ _ _ed__ _ _so good.__

“There’s something else.” Jongin whispered directly into Kyungsoo’s ear as he held him in his arms. “My parents don’t want me to bother your family anymore.” He said slowly.

“But you don’t-”

“I know.” He released Kyungsoo and gazed into his eyes. “They gave me the keys to the beach house so I can stay there.” Jongin smiled at a clueless Kyungsoo.

“I don’t see how that’s good- _ _oh.__ ” Kyungsoo understood then.

They gave Jongin a key to an empty house. He’d be staying there by himself. None of Kyungsoo’s friends would be there. Or Kyungsoo’s parents.

“I kind of made them give me the key.” Jongin continued, laying back down on the bed. “I like hearing you scream. It would be a shame if you stopped because your parents could hear.”

Kyungsoo felt his cheeks burning. He couldn’t say anything so he buried himself on Jongin’s chest with a groan.

Jongin enfolded him, laughing boisterously. _This,_ Kyungsoo thought, _I could get used to this._

* * *

“Wait what?” Chanyeol screamed at their face for the hundredth time and Kyungsoo wanted to strangle the taller one.

Okay maybe not the hundredth time but Kyungsoo’s sure it’s been a lot of times that Chanyeol asked the same thing after Jongin and he said that they’re dating. What's not to understand?

“I thought you two hated each other?” Chanyeol said with a confused expression, taking a sip from his beer.

“They didn’t. They were just being idiots.” Sooyoung jumped into the conversation. Joohyun stood in front of her, wrapped in her arms. A smile lingered on her lips as she winked at Kyungsoo. 

“It’s weird, seeing Kyungsoo like this.” Chanyeol kept talking and pointing at Kyungsoo who was currently seated on Jongin’s lap. Kyungsoo thought it was weird too. He's never been a fan of affection but with Jongin, it just felt right.

“You should get used to it.” Jongin tightened his hold around Kyungsoo. “I’m not letting him go.” He said, planting a kiss on Kyungsoo’s shoulder.

“Well, still-”

“Will you stop talking or do I need to punch you?” Jihyo uttered at Chanyeol and the taller one leaned back on his seat with a horrified expression on his face.

Everyone started laughing at Jihyo’s remark, including her. Kyungsoo was happy that she was more comfortable around their circle of friends. 

“Oh, I love this one!” Sooyoung suddenly screamed grabbing Joohyun’s hand and led her to the dance floor.

“Jihyo, my baby girl?” Baekhyun stretched out his hand to the timid girl, but she took it in and they headed to the crowd too.

Kyungsoo noticed a gloomy expression ghost on Chanyeol’s face as he watched Baekhyun walk away with Jihyo. He didn’t have time to ask because Jongin placed his head on his shoulder and talked into his ear.

“You wanna dance too?” He asked, his warm breath tickling Kyungsoo’s skin.

He took one last look at Chanyeol, he was talking to Johnny.

“Yeah.” Kyungsoo answered his boyfriend and stood up from his lap.

They walked to the dance floor hand in hand. Kyungsoo already felt his cheeks get warmer by people’s stares.

Jongin wrapped a hand around his waist as he held the other one. “You know,” Jongin started talking, observing the people around them, “I never wanted to come here. My parents made me.” He whispered, sending Kyungsoo a playful smirk. “I’m happy they made me.” He said with a lot softer tone.

“Me too.” Kyungsoo replied. “I’m happy too.” He really was.

Kyungsoo never thought they would end up like this. He remembered thinking that Jongin would leave hating him.

But now, swinging side to side in each other’s arms, Kyungsoo felt serene.

Jongin kissed him gently before Kyungsoo placed his head on Jongin’s chest as Across The Universe played softly.

On this sweet summer night, Kyungsoo was brave enough to dare to think the he wass indeed in love with this pretty boy.

"Also," Jongin kept speaking. "I asked your mom if you could stay with me tonight."

Kyungsoo lifted his head from Jongin's chest, looking at the latter expectantly.

"She said yes." Jongin whispered leaning down to kiss Kyungsoo's forehead. "Don't drink too much tonight." 

"Why?" Kyungsoo asked, staring at the taller boy confusedly.

"I don't want you to get numb." Jongin said putting his other hand on Kyungsoo's waist too, pulling him closer. "I want you to feel everything I'll do to you tonight." He whispered into Kyungsoo's ear.

Kyungsoo nuzzled closer into the latter. He couldn't wait.

 


	2. (it's not like) I'm falling in love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kyungsoo and jongin being dorks and baekhyun being hopelessly in love and a little background of their life.. honestly this is a mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoyed writing a sequel to this, hope you'll enjoy reading it!
> 
> also sorry about the change of time used in the chapters I totally forgot I used past time in the first one oops

"So Julien is from a poor family, right? And he wants to stop being poor."

"Couldn't have said it better."

"Shut up. Anyway, he's from the low part of the society and his father always beats him up for stupid shit that I can't really remember since it's been a while I've read it but it's not important. This guy is tired of his status and he wants to change it and he's always been a big fan of Napeleon, which caused him to desire being a soldier. And being a soldier during that period was a big deal, you know, Napeleon's army and shit. So yeah, he thinks that he can raise his status by joining the army but Napeleon gets miserably defeated in Waterloo so the military loses all its honor, thus resulting in army losing its value. And while all this shit happens-"

"You say 'shit' a lot while you're telling me about one of the greatest novels of the nineteenth century. I don't think many people would appreciate that."

"But you're not one of those many people, are you Jihyo, my love?"

"No," the girl mumbles, diverting his eyes towards the blue sea, the rays of sun pierce through the surface of the water. "But-"

"Then please stop interrupting me." Kyungsoo flashes her a grin and keeps talking after taking a sip of the wine. "While all that happens, the church gains power and respect and suddenly replaces the army, as in value-wise. So our guy Julien thinks this time, it's better to become a priest. The book's about him, stuck in a dilemma of what he's passionate about and what would benefit him. And for the title, yeah, the red symbolizes the uniform of Napeleon's army while the black symbolizes the black cape of the priests."

"What would you choose?" Jihyo asks suddenly, raising an eyebrow. Her caramel skin shines under the sun.

"What?"

"Between your passion and what's necessary?" Jihyo muses, "What would capture you, body and soul?" 

Kyungsoo ends up frowning, the answer isn't clear to him. And why would Jihyo suddenly ask a question like this anyway? "I've never been in the same conditions with the character-"

"It's not that deep, Soo." The girl rolls her eyes and lays down on the thin blanket. "Just tell me if you'd be brave enough to not give up on what you love to have a 'supposedly' better way of living."

Kyungsoo's frown only deepens and he purses his lips. Ironic, how Jihyo asks him this after being well aware of how he spent weeks denying his feelings for Jongin. 

As if the man himself felt Kyungsoo thinking about him, he emerges from the water, droplets falling down all over his body, his shorts totally damp which causes it to stick his skin and makes it very, very hard for Kyungsoo to focus and give a deep, meaningful answer to Jihyo. 

"Well, you know, Jihyo," he says as he watches his boyfriend approach him with a small grin on his lips. "I've always been a coward." He ends up saying and Jihyo doesn't even bother to contain her chuckle. 

"What's so funny?" Jongin slumps down next to him, his wetness spreads on Kyungsoo's shirt as he leans down to his side. 

"You know what's _not_ funny? You ruining my favorite shirt." Kyungsoo deadpans and hears Jihyo giggle once again before she excuses herself to go join their friends in the water. "Wait, we're not done-"

"Kyungsoo, I loved the book, I really did but please, for the love of God, let me have some fun!" Jihyo flicks on Kyungsoo's nose and walks away. Kyungsoo sighs and takes another sip.

"You know, I love how you're a nerd, but you really need to spare me some time." Jongin tilts his head so cutely, in a way that is hard for Kyungsoo to contain himself and kiss away the small pout on his boyfriend's lips. But ever since he learned that it's a way for Jongin to get things his way, it's been easier to stop himself.

He brushes the damp hair sticking into Jongin's eye and stares him. "You know that doesn't work with me anymore." He flashes a smirk and leans away but Jongin slids and arm around his waist and pulls Kyungsoo closer to his side. Kyungsoo chuckles at Jongin's pursed lips and runs a finger over the soft skin of their plumpness. "We're basically living together."

"That's not enough." Jongin rests his head on Kyungsoo's shoulder and Kyungsoo, who would be very angry if anyone else was wetting his clothes like that, places a small kiss on his boyfriend's head and lets the man hug him. 

It's been a little less than two weeks since Jongin's parents left and they basically moved into the house they bought. They only use one room, yeah, the living room, since it's empty except for the mattress they threw in the middle. The day time, they spend it with their friends or Kyungsoo's parents or with Axel who discovers new things everyday. Kyungsoo isn't really that interested in what the older man digs out but it's always fun to watch Jongin hiss at Eliott whenever the latter even gets closer to Kyungsoo. And the nights were spent at Jongin's parents' house, sometimes cuddling, sometimes exploring each other's bodies, not leaving a spot that their lips haven't touched. Sometimes both. 

Jongin seems to enjoy their every moment together as much as Kyungsoo does but lately the older one frowns a lot more, he's clingier than ever and his hands always find a way touch Kyungsoo somehow. Whether if it's a rufle of hair, a small massage session after they play volleyboy or a wrap of arms just like now. Kyungsoo enjoys all these small gestures while he's also a little scared. Jongin's touches burn. They burn and they never lose their warmth. The older male is gentle and sweet, even when Kyungsoo wants him to be rough at some nights, begs him to be. But Jongin is ofter afraid of hurting him or doing something wrong. 

_It scares the shit out of Kyungsoo._

What if he does something stupid?

What if he does something that'll hurt Jongin?

What if he'll be the one to screw it up all? Because God knows, he's great at losing good things in his life.

"Hey," Jongin tightens his hold around Kyungsoo's waist, making Kyungsoo look down on him. "I'm joking." He says and moves his head up, planting a small kiss on Kyungsoo's cheek. 

"I know." 

Jongin plants another kiss on his cheekbone. And the one on his nose. One on the edge of his lips. And then finally, he captures his lips. So gently yet so passionate as he brings his hands to hold Kyungsoo's face and Kyungsoo feels the warmth again. It turns his insides, makes him feel giddy and excited as if he hasn't been tasting Jongin for the last few weeks. As if he's never felt Jongin's lust digging holes in him. As if it was their first kiss. 

Kyungsoo freezes at the sensation as Jongin's tongue touches his, sparking yet another flame inside him. He holds on to Jongin's small yet firm waist, feeling his muscles tense up under his touch. The older one straightens up a little, tilting his head so he could get a better angle. Just like that, Kyungsoo feels like a snowflake, melting under the rays of sun and he doesn't even put up a fight. If it's gonna be Jongin's touches that'll devour him, he's ready. 

Kyungsoo feels Jongin's hand on his chest, the latter is pushing him down slowly until Kyungsoo's back meets the soft blanket over the sand of the beach. Kyungsoo lets out a silent moan as Jongin moves down on to suck on his jawline, his tongue leaving a wet trail. Jongin drops his hand on Kyungsoo's belly, his slender fingers creeping inside Kyungsoo's shirt. Kyungsoo can feel other one's forming bulge press over his thigh, sighing out breathily. He presses his lips together, trying to contain his moans because he knows once he lets go, the entire town would be aware of the fact he is indeed enjoying this more than anything he's ever done. 

He looks down at Jongin when he feels the latter's teeth dig into his neck. Jongin stares back at him with clouded eyes. "Don't hold it in." Jongin says in a hushed voice and Kyungsoo suddenly feels tight in his shorts.

"Jongin-"

"What do you want, baby?" Jongin whispers, his warm breath caresses Kyungsoo's skin.

“I don’t know what he wants but I sure don’t want to you two fucking in front of me.”

Kyungsoo almost chokes on his own saliva as he lets go of Jongin’s lips and looks up to see Baekhyun watching them with an half amused half disgusted expression.

“You know Soo, I love a show but not the one of my best friend.”

“Then go.” Jongin dares to sound annoyed, almost unapologetic even though they are caught on top of each other. “That way, you won’t have to watch.”

Baekhyun frowns and releases a deep sigh. “This is a public beach. You go.”

“Look-”

“Jongin, can you get me a bottle of water?” Kyungsoo asks with a hushed voice, begging Jongin with his eyes to calm down.

“Fine.” Jongin stand up and stretches. He doesn’t even bother to hide his erected length as he looks straight in Baekhyun’s eyes. And then he walks away while Kyungsoo gathers the blanket around himself to hide his bulge.

“Would you be offended if I punch your boyfriend in the face?” Baekhyun slumps down next to him and releases a scoff, pursing his lips.

“Shut up,” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes at his friend and moves a little closer. “I don’t understand. You two were fine, you liked him so much. What’s changed?”

“You.” Baekhyun’s eyes are fixated ahead, at some blonde girl that Kyungsoo can't exactly see who she is from this far. “All you do is fuck your boyfriend. I don’t even get to see you anymore.”

“It’s been just a few days, don’t exaggerate.”

“It’s the other way around now.”

“What?”

“You yelled me for leaving you alone. For him.” Baekhyun pulls his legs closer to himself, wraps his arms around and rests his head on his knees. He seems smaller this way, like a little kid. A capful of wind caresses his hair and the locks fall over his eyes, the wind carries his smell to Kyungsoo. It’s a different scent. Kyungsoo doesn’t recognize it. “Now you’re doing the same.”

“You know, he’ll be leaving soon-”

“We will too. We all live in South Korea, Kyungsoo. We come here for summers. You’ll find a way to meet there too.” Baekhyun’s voice trembles and Kyungsoo’s eyes widen in shock.

He didn’t even realize neglecting his friend. They spend the entire day together, but it was also true that he was with Jongin most of the time. Eating with Jongin, drinking with him, swimming with him, reading with him, playing for him. He never for once thought it would affect Baekhyun since the latter seemed- well, he doesn’t know how he seemed. Fuck. He really fucked up this time, didn’t he?

“I’m sorry, really.” He says in a small voice. He wraps his arms around himself and frowns. “You know, after everything that’s happened, I think I kind of lost myself in this... newfound happiness?”

“Please don’t talk like one of those romantic novel characters, it makes me wanna barf.” Baekhyun smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. The brown orbs stay on Kyungsoo for a few seconds before they turn back to that girl again.

“Hey, who’s that you’re watching?” Kyungsoo asks, hoping that Baekhyun wouldn’t scold him.

Baekhyun squints at him before he answers. “No one.”

“Then why won’t you stop watching her?” Kyungsoo looks over at the sea again. "I should've brought my glasses." He says before his eyes turn to Baekhyun again.

“I’m not watching her, I’m watching the sunset.” Baekhyun moves his legs and lays on his back.

“It’s 2 pm Baek, there’s no sunset.” Kyungsoo pinches his side, Baekhyun bats his hand away.

He closes his eyes and Kyungsoo turns his head to the side to check on Jongin. The taller one stands next to the snack bar, a water bottle in hand. He’s looking around with a small pout and yeah, his dick is down. What a shame. But Kyungsoo feels a warmness spread over his chest. Jongin really waited there, doing nothing, so that the two friends could talk.

He feels a weird feeling flip his stomach. It’s been happening too many times lately. Particularly, whenever Jongin does something nice. Even the smallest things. Like buying Kyungsoo flowers, singing him to sleep, preparing breakfast for him -even though he burnt those toasts- and Kyungsoo feels a pang in his heart. Not in a bad way but it hurts too. This feeling that he can’t exactly pinpoint burns him inside and outside, he often runs to the bathroom or just kisses Jongin out of nowhere so there would be something to take his head off this problem.

“Hey, how about this,” He starts talking when his eyes starts hurting from squinting too much. “My parents won’t be home tomorrow night. Axel’s having a gathering and they’ll probably stay there too.” He looks down on Baekhyun, his best friends has one eye open and stares back at him with knitted eyebrows. “We’ll watch a movie and have a dinner together. It’ll be like a slumber party, huh?”

Kyungsoo expects Baekhyun to make fun of his phrasing, but the latter seems abstracted. Then he looks at Kyungsoo with an unreadable expression. “You boyfriend won’t be there?”

“No one else. Just us.”

Baekhyun smiles a little, not the playful and vivacious smile Kyungsoo’s used to but still, his eyes turn into cute crescents and his tiny teeth show from between his lips. “Are you sure his dick won’t fall off without you?”

“Wrong.”

“What?”

“You’re making the joke in the wrong context. You’re supposed to say that his dick would fall off because we fuck way too much.”

Baekhyun’s smile erases and he gapes. “Fuck you. You’re preparing the food tomorrow.”

Kyungsoo’s laughter is loud but it quickly dies when Baekhyun lightly punches him on the stomach. Well, the other intends for the stomach but because Kyungsoo moves, the punch lands on his swollen dick. Kyungsoo’s mouth falls open with his silent scream and he looks up at his friend who seems puzzled whether if he should laugh or say sorry. _He laughs._

“You’re boyfriend’s coming, bye!” Baekhyun stutters and lifts off from the blanket and runs towards the sea.

“Is everything okay?” Jongin asks, his eyebrows raise to his forehead and and he points at Kyungsoo’s hand, fisted over his dick. “Want me to help you with that?”

“Baekhyun punched me on the dick!” Kyungsoo yells, expecting his boyfriend to drop the bottle and run after Baekhyun but the latter _laughs._ “What the fuck? Don’t laugh!”

Jongin crouches down next to him and grabs his hand. “I guess I’ll have to delicately take care of you tonight.” He says in a low voice and Kyungsoo forgets the pain on his below and focuses on the one above, right inside the small part of his heart. It’s there yet again. But Kyungsoo feels the pain melt away as Jongin’s lips stretch into a stunning smile.

The latter hooks an arm under Kyungsoo’s legs and another around his waist and suddenly Kyungsoo’s ass isn’t touching the ground anymore. He shrieks, arms wrapping around Jongin’s neck for dear life. “What are you doing?!”

“You’re injured.”

“I can still walk!”

“I don’t care.” Jongin shrugs and starts walking.

Kyungsoo can see his friends watching them from afar. Fuck. They’ll never stop teasing him about this.

* * *

Kyungsoo lets out a huff when his back finally meets the soft material of his bed in his parent's house. “I was fine, you know,” he mutters as he watches Jongin sits on the bed. “You didn’t have to carry me.”

“I know. I wanted to.”

“You wanted to humiliate me in front of my friends?” Kyungsoo sinks down on the bed, a small frown forming on his face.

“Is that how you really feel? Humiliated?”

It’s not. It’s _really_ not. Kyungsoo is in fact scared of his friends making fun of him but it wouldn’t be the first time, and him and Jongin are not the only ones. Joohyun and Sooyoung had their fair share of teasing and couple jokes.

Scared.

That’s how Kyungsoo truly feels like. He enjoys Jongin’s attention and care. He loves how the older one never leaves his side and makes sure their hands stay connected. He adores every little thing Jongin does for him and it’s terrifying to even think of the possibily of ruining it all. He sinks deeper in his place because he might have just ruined it already.

“I won’t do it again, okay?” Jongin stands up and crosses his arms over his naked chest. The droplets of water are still visible, sliding down on the other boy’s smooth and firm and marked chest.

He walks over the mini fridge and and grabs a bag of ice, throwing it to Kyungsoo.

“I’m going back to swim.”

And that’s all Jongin says before leaving the room.

Kyungsoo groans quietly and throws his head back, colliding with the metal bedhead which causes him to let out another groan, a loud one this time as his hands fly up to his head.

“What happened?!”

Jongin walks right back in and moves towards Kyungsoo. The pained boy stays silent and points at the back of his head because his voice threatens to tremble and if he says something, he’s actually going to be humiliated this time.

Jongin moves closer on the bed and removes Kyungsoo’s hands. “Where does it hurt? Here?” He gently taps on his head, making Kyungsoo flinch. Kyungsoo nods and closes his eyes as Jongin grabs the bag of ice and slowly puts it over the spot Kyungsoo hit.

The coolnes sends shivers to Kyungsoo’s body but it feels good. At least ice will numb the pain a little but he sure will suffer from a headache later.

Jongin’s free hand holds Kyungsoo’s and only then Kyungsoo opens his eyes and stares at his own hand. He twisted it into a fist and his knuckles are almost white. He lets it relax and Jongin intertwines their fingers almost instantly. The tension on his shoulders eases and he leans his body on Jongin’s. He feels Jongin’s head rest over his own.

“Jongin-”

“Sleep a little. You must be tired.” Jongin interrupts him and Kyungsoo ends up letting out a sigh. At least Jongin is still there, holding him. He draws circles on the back of his hand, knowing that it loosens Kyungsoo up. Kyungsoo already feels his eyelids get heavier with every small mouvement of Jongin’s hand and he finally lets himself fall into the reassuring hands of sleep.

“I’m sorry,” He mumbles before he loses his conscious.

* * *

Jongin looks down on the bottle he’s holding. It’s empty. He throws it over the garbage can, it makes a clutter as it collides the other bottles. He hates beer but it’s free, so who cares?

He left Kyungsoo after the smaller man fell asleep. He strolled back to the beach but their friends were already gone, which was fine. He wanted to be alone anyway. He needed to think.

The last two weeks were probably, no, definitely the greatest fourteen days of his life. But also the most confusing ones. Everything was okay, Kyungsoo seemed to have shaken off his awkwardness and shyness around Jongin. It was only the two of them at nights, alone at Jongin’s family’s new beach house. And even when they were with their friends, it would still be only them, in their little world together as Kyungsoo so casually seated himself on Jongin’s lap and as their hands wouldn’t leave each other for even a second. However, sometimes Kyungsoo would zone out as if something was disturbing him. His eyebrows would furrow together in worry but when Jongin asked him, Kyungsoo would send him a tired but still sappy smile and tell him nothing’s wrong.

Moments like these would worry Jongin. He couldn’t help but feel ill at heart as the horrifying thoughts would fill his mind

_What if Kyungsoo’s regretting it?_

What if he’s regretting ever agreeing to date Jongin? What if he’s not satisfied with their relationship? What if the only reason he still sticks with Jongin is because he enjoys the sex? Because if there’s a God above, he or she -or whichever pronoun is prefered by the God- the sex was just _fine._

But meanwhile, Jongin’s feelings escalated too. He knows Kyungsoo’s favorite books now, he knows every part of this town that Kyungsoo feels at home. He knows that Kyungsoo sucks on his thumb when he’s asleep. He can still recall the pain he felt when Kyungsoo pinched him on the arm when he asked if he’d rather suck on something else. He knows how Kyungsoo got that small scar on the low of his back. He’s kissed that scar for almost a hundred times now.

And he thought that, through out the entire time they spent together, Kyungsoo felt the same. But he slowly started to doubt it as days kept passing and as Kyungsoo started to zone out even more, as he kept turning down any affectionate gesture. And Jongin has no idea about what to do.

After a few more minutes spent in the warm water, he got out and moved to go home but Sooyoung appeared out of nowhere and dragged him to that bar where they get free beers because the owner is friends with Kyungsoo’s parents.

And that’s why he’s there, sitting with a visible frown on his face and opening another bottle. He watches his friends with clouded eyes as his mind keeps going back to Kyungsoo, he can’t stop thinking about the latter. _Why did he say sorry?_ The question won’t leave his head and he’s about to flip tables, literally, because he doesn’t know how to restrain the frustration pumping into his veins.

“Why the long face?”

Baekhyun slumps down on a chair across him. Jongin doesn’t even bother look at the other boy, he knows their conversation will end in a banter. It keeps happening lately even though Jongin thought they were just fine. Apparently nothing is the way he thinks, he just gave up on that.

“No answer? That’s rude.”

He turns towards the other one, and surprisingly, he finds an amused expression on Baekhyun’s face rather than the scowl he’s been getting lately.

“You’re no fun when your other half isn’t around.” Baekhyun grabs a handful of nuts and throws them into his mouth all at once. Jongin just stares at the man and finally a grin grows on his lips as Baekhyun starts coughing. “Don’t tell anyone.” He manages to say in between deep breaths.

“Whatever.” Jongin takes another sip.

“You’ve been drinking a lot. That shit’s gonna get you sick.” Baekhyun raises his eyebrows. “Why do you think it’s free? It’s no good.”

“Why do you suddenly care about me?”

“You’re fucking my best friend.” He says it so casually before clasping his hands together. “What if you give him a disease or something?”

“Uh- I don’t think cheap beer would-”

“I don’t care.” Baekhyun turns his head towards another direction, to where people are dancing. Where Jongin danced with Sooyoung to get Joohyun jealous. Where he danced with Kyungsoo for the first time. He shakes his head to shake off the thought of his boyfriend and tries to focus on where Baekhyun’s eyes are fixed.

“I didn’t think you were into girls.” Jongin says without thinking.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Baekhyun says, his eyes remain on the blonde, dainty-looking girl.

“I don’t know, honestly.” Jongin leans back on the chair. “There are pretty girls around and I never saw you make a move on any of them. I thought you could be into Jihyo, though. You seemed to have a way with her.”

“She’s a good friend.” Baekhyun replies dryly. It surprising, really. Jongin never thought that the latter would actually talk him without showing hostile manners but here they are, talking. Jongin can’t lie, he missed Baekhyun’s company. The other boy was one of the very few nice people when he first came here. “I was a little sad about what happened between her and Kyungsoo.”

“I see.”

“Because I know how unrequited love hurts.”

Baekhyun turns to him this time, expression chagrined, almost pained. Tears slowly welling on the sides of his eyes are visible even though it’s dark. Jongin just keeps staring at him. He expected pointy looks and snarky remarks from his boyfriend’s best friend, not a sudden confession about his love life.

“I-... uh- I’ve never seen her around before?” He mumbles quietly.

“She just arrived,” Baekhyun replies, sniffling a little. “She wasn’t supposed come here this summer but I guess she likes hurting me.” A small smile graces his lips, it’s not a _smile_ smile, but a gloomy one, longing. Jongin knows it because not long ago, that’s how Sooyoung looked at Joohyun. It’s probably how he looked at Kyungsoo.

“Maybe-... I- uh, I don’t know Baekhyun. If you wanna tell me the story maybe I can help you understand why she’s here?” Jongin offers. He’s not sure if Baekhyun talk to him, it seems rather personal but he’d be glad if the latter would trust him.

“I like her, she doesn’t like me. That’s all.”

“That can’t be all.”

“Oh, right, I forgot the part where she rejected me in the nicest way possible.” Baekhyun lets out a weary chuckle. “I can't even hate her because she had her reasons.”

“What reasons?” Jongins leans forward on his seat.

“She’s gonna move away for college. We’ll probably won’t see each other again after this summer.”

“Then don’t you think you should make a move?” Baekhyun’s head cracks towards Jongin in an instant, eyes wide. “If you like her that much, it’s worth a shot-”

“What part don’t you understand that she doesn’t feel the same?” Baekhyun’s voice raises a little, causing Jongin to avert his eyes from the boy.

He had never seen Baekhyun like this. He only knows sociable, always-cracking-jokes part of him. And honestly? It’s a little hurtful see this other side of him. He’s not sure what Baekhyun still thinks of him, but Jongin considers him a friend.

His eyes shoots up to the girl Baekhyun was staring. She’s no longer talking to her friends, no, her attention is on their table. On Baekhyun, who’s currently playing with his fingers, head down.

“I don’t think you’re aware of your chances.” Jongin’s lips stretch into a small smile as Baekhyun looks up to him. Jongin gestures at the girl, moving his head a little. Baekhyun turns his eyes towards the dancing pist. Wham! Jongin’s smile widens as the two’s eyes lock into each other as if it’s a movie.

The girl realizes what just happened and shakes her head, diving into the small crowd.

Jongin smirks at Baekhyun. “I think you know what to do.”

Baekhyun turns to him with wide eyes and mouth fell open. He stands up and takes a few steps towards the crowd but halts at place.

“Wait, you didn’t tell me what’s wrong with you.” Baekhyun crosses his arms over his chest and puts his weight on one foot as he keeps standing in front of Jongin.

“Are you serious-”

“C’mon Jong, if you won’t hurry I’m gonna lose my chance.”

“Don’t call me that.” Jongin knits his eyebrows together and only resists for a few seconds through their staring battle because hell, he does need help and he doesn’t want Baekhyun to miss that girl. “Kyungsoo seems down lately and I-.. I don’t know okay? I feel like he doesn’t want to be with me anymore, he looks like he’s bored.”

“And you look like you’re an idiot.” Baekhyun deadpans and bring his hands down on his hips. “Look, Kyungsoo has been staying by your side all this time. I even scolded him about ignoring me because of you!” He puffs his cheeks. “If I know my friend, and yes I do, there’s something else. Just make him talk.” He starts walking backwards. “And thank you!”

Jongin breathes out and rubs his eyes. Why is something so simple as a relationship must be so complicated?

He flinches when he sees Kyungsoo as he opens his eyes again. “You weren’t there when I woke up.” Kyungsoo says in a raspy tone. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes are still puffy from sleep. He looks like kid who lost his favorite stuffed bear. Jongin smiles a little and reaches out for his hand, pulling him on to his lap. Kyungsoo complies immediately, wrapping his arms around Jongin’s neck.

“Wasn’t sure you wanted me around.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Kyungsoo raises his head, his hair shoots towards all different directions. It looks cute but also funny so Jongin’s smile never leaves his lips as he straightens out his boyfriend’s hair.

“Something’s up with you.” He says and knows that he’s right as Kyungsoo glances away. “If you won’t tell me what’s wrong, we can’t fix it, baby.”

Kyungsoo buries his head in crook of Jongin’s neck and lets out a deep sigh, his warm breath tickles Jongin’s skin. “I never had an actual relationship until now,” he starts talking, voice low and soft. “Everytime I was with someone, or even got closer to dating someone, I somehow screwed it up.” He moves closer to Jongin. “I guess I’m just too demanding-”

“Kyungsoo-”

“No, let me finish.” Kyungsoo’s voice starts to tremble and Jongin’s already regretting forcing Kyungsoo to talk to him. “You know me, I’m not much of a person that enjoys attention but it’s never like that with you. I love it when you take care of me, I love how even though we’re in a crowd, it’s still just us. Everything you do just attracts me more and makes me want you more, makes me want from you more and I’m scared that you’re going to get tired because I know it’s selfish to think-”

Jongin cradles Kyungsoo’s cheeks and crashes their lips together. He pulls back before it turns into a make out session but their foreheads remain touching.

“I can’t believe this is the reason why you were sulking all the time.”

“I wasn’t-”

“Kyungsoo, I ran after you even though you were chasing a girl a few weeks earlier. Do you really think my feelings are that weak that they’ll just break because you demand too much?” Jongin lets out a chuckle. “Hell, I even want you to demand more!” He pulls Kyungsoo closer to himself, arms wrapping around the latter’s small body tightly.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. Just talk to me when something’s wrong.” He plants a small kiss on Kyungsoo’s messy hair and rests his chin over his head.

“Hey, where was Baekhyun going by the way?” Kyungsoo asks after a few minutes.

“He went after some girl he likes.”

“I thought Jihyo-”

“No not her. A blonde, shorter and thinner girl. She seemed really pale too and-”

“Shit.” Kyungsoo raises his head and he looks at the direction Baekhyun walked to. “Chanyeol told me that she came when I ran into him while coming here.” 

“You know her?” Jongin inquires and is even more intrigued when he sees Kyungsoo’s eyes shine.

“She was also one of my best friends.” He says, a small smile blooms on his face. "Me, her and Baekhyun were kind of a trio. I would play the piano and they would sing. We were inseparable.” His smile dies out and he lets out a sigh.

“Then?”

“Then, we got seperated.” Kyungsoo scoffs and glances at the people dancing. “They’re idiots.”

“Thank you, you’re totally being so obvious and I understand everything.”

Kyungsoo flicks his finger on Jongin’s forehead and ignores the small pout formed on Jongin’s lips. “Baekhyun liked her a lot but she told him that she doesn’t feel the same. But she did, I knew it. She talked to me before Baekhyun decided to confess. She wanted to do it first.”

“Then why didn’t she?”

“Baekhyun was a popular kid at school, you know, the usual story. Someone heard her talking to me about her feelings for him and spreaded all over the school. People never really dared to speak about it when Baekhyun was around because, yeah, he was the jokester but you wouldn’t wanna wake his angry side. Other girls kept bothering her, at some point it even turned into bullying and I tried to intervene but it wasn’t enough.”

“Why didn’t you tell Baekhyun?”

“She made me promise.” Kyungsoo breathes in deeply.

“Baekhyun thinks she doesn’t care about him.”

“Funny how it’s actually the other way around.” Kyungsoo looks at Jongin and the older one can tell that Kyungsoo is fighting back the tears in his eyes. “I almost got expelled because I pushed a girl a little harder than I should’ve because I saw them gang up on her and one of them slapping her. They were sick.”

Jongin wraps his arms around Kyungsoo and pulls him down on his chest. The smaller one shakes with silent hiccups.

“Kyungsoo, I know it’s not my place but I think you should talk to Baekhyun about it. I mean, you’re not at highschool anymore and his feelings still seem to be the same.”

“My parents won’t be home tomorrow so I told him that we’ll have dinner together, alone. I want to spare him some time.”

“Of course. Just tell him everything, okay? Let him decide what to do.”

“What if he hates me for keeping it from him?” Kyungsoo whispers and shivers inside Jongin’s arms.

“He’ll understand your reasons.” Jongin plants another kiss on the top of Kyungsoo’s head and urges him to stand up. “Let’s go home now. Let me see for myself if your dick is still fine.”

Kyungsoo laughs and his eyes turn into pretty crescents. “You really know how to ruin an emotional moment.”

“I don’t want to see you cry.” Jongin grabs his hand and intertwines them together. “Also, you didn’t tell me, what’s the girl’s name.”

“Taeyeon. Kim Taeyeon.”

* * *

“We can always rewatch Star Wars,” Baekhyun mumbles as he goes through Kyungsoo’s father’s movie collection. He’s crouched down next to the TV. “Or maybe we could go to the drive-in-theatre? What do you think?”

He looks up at Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo feels even more nervous. How do you tell your best friend that you kept the girl he liked liked him back but she couldn’t say anything because she was being bullied? How do you tell your someone you consider your brother that you hid the fact that his crush was being bullied? Kyungsoo bites his lower lip. There’s no turning back. He screwed up real bad and now he has to pay for it. Even so, he still wishes Jongin was there to hold him when Baekhyun tells him to fuck off and find a new friend. Because he’s pretty sure the latter won’t want to see him again after he tells him everything.

“Soo?” Kyungsoo glances at his friend who’s watching him with confused eyes. “Are you okay? You’re chewing on your lip hard. I think it’s bleeding.”

Kyungsoo runs his tongue over his lip and tastes the blood.

“Fuck,” He breathes out and walks to his friend. “I need to tell you something.”

“What? You wanna invite Jongin or something? This is supposed to be out night-”

“I lied to you.” Kyungsoo almost whispers, wrapping his arms around himself.

“What?”

“About Taeyeon.” Baekhyun knits his eyes together and straightens up as if he’s encouraging Kyungsoo to speak. “Remember when you asked me whether if I thought she was lying when she rejected you? And I told you she wasn’t? That was a lie.”

Baekhyun just stares at him, not uttering a word, not even seeming shocked. He just stares at Kyungsoo in total calmness. It scares the shit out of Kyungsoo. “She was... uh- the other girls in school, they were harassing her because they wanted you to like them and she didn’t want me to tell you because she didn’t want you to feel bad and I-... I’m really sorry, I should’ve come to you. You deserved to know and-”

“I did,” Baekhyun interrupts him with an emotionless tone and an unreadable face. “You both should’ve talked to me and let me decide for myself. But you didn’t.”

“Baek, I-” Kyungsoo can’t complete his sentence. He doesn’t have anything to say. He doesn’t have an excuse except for the promise he made to Taeyeon but it doesn’t hold any importance. Not to Baekhyun anyway. He was hurt, he’s probably still hurt. And if he decides that he doesn’t want Kyungsoo in his life anymore, it would only be fair. He could’ve been with the one he liked, he could’ve had a relationship like Kyungsoo has with Jongin but because Kyungsoo was a coward, Baekhyun doesn’t even get see Taeyeon anymore.

But, hell with it.

Kyungsoo doesn’t want to lose Baekhyun.

“You look like you’re about to cry.” Baekhyun starts talking and when Kyungsoo looks at his friend, he can see the playful smirk on his lips. “You’re lucky you have Jongin. He told me to go ahead and talk to her. I was with her before I came here, she told me everything.” Baekhyun sighs deeply and makes a move towards the couch, slumping down. “I understand your reasons but I’m still angry because they were stupid reasons. Not telling me about people bullying her because I would feel bad? Obviously I would feel bad but I’d still fuck them up. Anyone who hurts her.” He pats the empty space next to him for Kyungsoo to sit. “And you,” he says softly. “I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you too. You’re my best friend. Just don’t lie to me again, okay?”

Kyungsoo nods instead of answering. If he opens his mouth, he’s going to choke on his hiccups and tears.

“Now,” Baekhyun leans back. “Let’s choose a movie!”

“Fuck the movie.” Kyungsoo mumbles, sniffling and drying the sides of his eyes. “Tell me what you talked about.”

“With who?”

“Your mom.” He deadpans at the latter. “Taeyeon of course! Who else?!”

“Stop yelling at me, I’ll leave.” Baekhyun raises an eyebrow and Kyungsoo just laughs.

“Yeah, yeah sure, just tell me if everything’s okay.”

“Nothing gets better in a snap of fingers, Soo. We’ll need time but at least we agreed not to act like strangers around each other.”

“That’s a start. I’m glad.”

“Yeah,” Baekhyun shows off a bitter smile. “Me too.”

* * *

“Stop it.” Kyungsoo whispers in a firmer tone but he’s sure it still won’t stop Jongin. The older one nuzzles even closer and plants a kiss on Kyungsoo’s ear. Kyungsoo can feel his boyfriend’s dick poking him on the ass. He tries to move away but Jongin’s strong arms keeps him in place, which is his lap.

They’re out at night, celebrating a birthday. Apparently Chanyeol befriended someone called Yixing and his birthday is in October but since he’ll be leaving for China and they won’t see each other in his actual birthday date, they decided to celebrate it earlier so they could be together.

“Is he, you know, just a friend?” Kyungsoo asked Sooyoung when they first met the Chinese guy. She didn’t answer but the answer was obvious in her eyes. In Chanyeol and Yixing’s too because they shone brighter than the stars above them when they looked at each other.

At some point of the night, Kyungsoo found himself walking towards Taeyeon. When he reached her, they just stared at each other before they simultaneously started crying and hugged each other.

They talked a little after they pulled themselves together. About college, about whether if Kyungsoo is still interested in musicbecause _I will hunt you down to your grave if you don’t go apply for a conservatoire,_ Taeyeon seemed dead serious when she clutched on Kyungsoo’s arm. Kyungsoo laughed and told her the same.

That’s when he felt a gentle hand caressing is back. He turned around to see his boyfriend standing behind him with a soft smile on his lips, cheeks a little flushed because of the alcohol.

“My boyfriend, Jongin. And this is-”

“Taeyeon, yeah, I know,” Jongin mumbled, slurring his words a little. “Don’t hurt Baekhyun- ah!” He yelped when Kyungsoo pinched his forearm and turned to his boyfriend with betrayed eyes.

“Talking about Baekhyun, why don’t you go to him? This one seems to need a rest.” He pointed at Jongin and sent Taeyeon a smile, the latter nodded slowly and walked away and that’s how Kyungsoo and Jongin ended up sitting away from everyone, Jongin trying to fuck him in the middle of the party.

“Jongin, please,” Kyungsoo almost begs, trying to escape his boyfriend’s hold. “There are people here, people who aren’t used to our affection displays.”

“Then let’s go home.”

“It wouldn’t be nice and-”

“Please go.”

Kyungsoo turns around to the owner of the voice. Chanyeol stands in front of them, a cup of beer in hand and with an expression of irritability. Kyungsoo captures his lower lip between his teeth and tries to think of an explanation.

“Jongin is-”

“Horny, yeah, we can all see that.” Chanyeol deadpans.

“Fuck you, as if you don’t wanna fuck your man.” Jongin replies the other boy.

“I-... That’s none of your business! Just go okay, it’s fine.” Chanyeol walks away, stomping his feet like a child and joins the others.

“You’re unbelievable.” Kyungsoo unwraps Jongin’s arms around himself, taking advantage of the latter’s momentary lack of attention and stands up. He stands away from his boyfriend, arms twisting over his chest as an annoyed pout graces his lips.

Jongin looks at him, eyes squinted, the bulge inside his pants is visible. He throws a calculating look at the crowd of their friends, making Kyungsoo look at them too. Everyone seems to be talking to each other and enjoying the night.

“Don’t yell.” Jongin says so suddenly and he takes a step towards Kyungsoo.

“W-what do you mean?”

“Just don’t. I don’t want their attention."

“What-”

Kyungsoo’s question gets interrupted as he sudden is no longer on his feet. Nope.

Jongin just grabbed him by his waist and threw him over his shoulder. Like a fucking flour sack.

“What the fuck, Jongin?!” Kyungsoo whispers, trying to hold on to his boyfriend.

“I’m taking you home.”

“I can walk.”

“You didn’t seem like you wanted to.” Jongin answers back. Kyungsoo can sense the playfulness through his voice. Son of a bitch, he’s enjoying this.

“I’ll walk, let me down.”

“No.”

“Jongin.”

“No.”

“Hey- ah! What the hell? Did you just-”

“Spank you? Yeah, I’ll do it again if you won’t stop talking.” Jongin says and his words travel straight to Kyungsoo’s dick. Yeah, he likes Jongin taking control whenever they have sex but he didn’t think he’d... _like to be dominated?_ Kyungsoo doesn’t know how to put it into words but he liked what just happened. Maybe he should keep talking?

Jongin quickens his steps as Kyungsoo keeps silent. His hands and feet dangle over from Jongin’s shoulder. “The house isn’t that close just put me down- shit!”

Another spank.

It doesn’t hurt much though. Maybe he should ask Jongin to do it when they’re naked.

A few more minutes and they’re finally home.

Jongin puts Kyungsoo down and locks the door and before Kyungsoo could react, he pushes Kyungsoo against the door, connecting their lips into a fervent, violent kiss. Kyungsoo can taste the expensive wine Chanyeol bought on his boyfriend's warm tongue.

Jongin pushes his thigh between Kyungsoo’s legs, caressing his forming bulge.

He plants a kiss on the side of Kyungsoo’s lips and then traces a road of kisses down his jaw and the junction of his neck, his tongue wetting Kyungsoo’s skin.

“Jongin-... ah- Jongin. Bed.” Kyungsoo whispers, throwing his head back and bumping into the door. He winces in pain and Jongin’s lips leave his skin burning.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, let’s go to bed.”

“I thought I was the impatient one.” Jongin says with a grin on his face.

“You got me all hot and bothered, what were you expecting?” Kyungsoo walks towards the mattress thrown on the floor while taking off his shirt on the way.

He turns back to Jongin, he’s welcomed with another kiss, a soft but passionate one. Jongin kisses him lazily, tasting him gently. His hands move down on Kyungsoo’s waist and they both sink down on the floor, Kyungsoo’s back finally meeting the mattress. Jongin trails a way down on his skin again. His jaw, neck and collarbones. He peppers kisses all over his boyfriend.

Jongin looks at him, eyes heavily clouded and Kyungsoo can see the hunger taking over the other boy.

He twists a finger around one nipple and Kyungsoo lets out a whimper as he throws his head back. He bites his lip when he feels Jongin blow over his other nipple, his cold breath hardening the lobe before his warm tongue swirls around it. Kyungsoo’s moan is loud as he writhes under Jongin in ecstasy.

Jongin finally lets go of his abused nipples and plants kisses over his naked abdomen.

Kyungsoo looks up at him when he feels Jongin’s lips leave his body.

He’s removing his clothes and Kyungsoo straightens up just a little to get off of his own clothes but Jongin pushes him on his back again and his hands starts roaming over his bulge through Kyungsoo’s jeans. He finally reaches for the button of his jeans and removes everything in one go. His eyes travel on Kyungsoo’s body before he dives in to kiss him again. He always does that. Looking at Kyungsoo as if he’s a gift from the god. He’s not aware of the fact that _he’s_ the gift.

Jongin stops kissing him but their lips are still touching. There’s some kind of darkness in his eyes. The darkness Kyungsoo is used to by now. The darkness Kyungsoo is excited to see it in his eyes every night.

“You seemed you enjoy that short spanking session. You didn’t even complain.” Jongin whispers over his lips. Kyungsoo bites his lip but he doesn’t avert his gaze. They’re in a relationship. Together. They both have the right to say what they like or don’t. Right?

Jongin kisses his cheek and then his tongue traces the outline of Kyungsoo’s ear, biting it a little. “Tell me, Soo.” His voice is low and enchanting, like a song of the Sirens. “Do you like it?”

Kyungsoo gulps slowly. He doesn’t utter even a word. And then he feels Jongin’s fingers close around his nipple again and tug at it. Hard. He clutches on Jongin’s shoulders at the sensation and his nails dig into his boyfriend’s skin. “Answer me.” Jongin whispers to his ear again.

“Yes.” Kyungsoo breathes out, his cock twitches in urgency and he needs a release and Jongin didn’t even do anything yet.

“Do you want more?” Jongin pulls away just enough to look at him, a small grin is formed on his lips. Kyungsoo nods.

Jongin smiles widely and he pecks Kyungsoo on the lips.

And then he places his hands over Kyungsoo’s hips and turns Kyungsoo around. Kyungsoo sits on his knees, palms against the soft material of the mattress. His ass perks up towards Jongin as if he’s presenting a gift.

And then he feels it.

Jongin’s palm against his bare ass.

And it hurts.

And it hurts so good.

Kyungsoo grabs on to the blanket thrown over the mattress, trying to hold his whimpers and moans. He can feel Jongin’s chest leaning over his back, skin on skin. Warm breath touches his ear.

“Are you okay?” Jongin’s voice is low and quiet. Kyungsoo can feel both the worry and the desire in his tone. “Kyungsoo-”

“One more.” Kyungsoo mumbles and he can feel Jongin smile against his skin. “Again. Please.”

Jongin draws away and Kyungsoo braces himself for another spank but Jongin’s palm softly touches his ass cheek, rubbing the spot he hit. “You’re so pale,” Jongin says, “It’s already red all over.”

“Jongin-”

And another. Jongin smacks his palm over the abused and sensitive skin and Kyungsoo already sees stars.

“You okay?”

“One more.”

“Kyungsoo-”

“One more.” Kyungsoo says firmly as Jongin’s hand rubs his skin again. He’s a little afraid maybe he’s taking it too far, startling Jongin with this new demanding side of him, but god, it feels so good.

“You’re going to be the death of me.” Jongin kisses the between of his shoulder blades. “What am I going to do with you?”

“Fuck me. Isn’t that what you wanted?” Kyungsoo says with a grin on his lips and he can feel Jongin’s smile on his skin too.

“Ready?” Jongin asks and Kyungsoo wiggles his hips as a response.

He feels Jongin’s palm burn his skin and drops himself on the bed, totally wasted. But Jongin raises his hips again. “I don’t think I can take another- _oh._ ”

Jongin pulls his cheeks apart and his tongue traces his rim as his hands stay on Kyungsoo’s sides to keep him steady. Kyungsoo doesn’t even try to hold himself back anymore. A whimper mixed with Jongin’s name escapes his mouth and he pushes back against Jongin’s skillful tongue. Jongin keeps lapping at his puckered hole. He feels Jongin’s fingers dance around the base of his cock and his back bends in pleasure.

“Jongin-...”

Jongin raises from between Kyungsoo’s legs and turns him over, hovering above him to grab the lube and condoms from under the bed. He licks his wet lips and pours a handful of lube before tossing the bottle away.

He pushes one finger in and Kyungsoo raises his arms. Jongin seems to understand his intentions, he leans down towards him. Kyungsoo captures his cheeks between his hands and pulls him down for a kiss. Their lips move against each other with greed as Jongin adds another digit and moves them slowly, too slow if you ask Kyungsoo. He’s already pained by his throbbing cock. He needs Jongin inside him.

“Jongin-... ah- please...”

“You’re different tonight.” Jongin looks at him with an amused expression but traces of confusion on his face are also visible. “I like this.” He says and removes his finges.

He reaches out for a condom and puts the rubber on, spreading the lube left on his hand over his erected dick.

Jongin kisses him slowly as he pushes inside Kyungsoo, wrecking his walls open. Kyungsoo closes his eyes and throws his head back when Jongin starts pushing into him faster and harder. His breathing becomes heavier with every snap of Jongin’s hips against his.

Kyungsoo’s back arches in pleasure and he looks over at Jongin for a moment. His boyfriend seems just as messy as him.

Jongin leans down on him again and Kyungsoo grabs a handful of his hair as Jongin attacks his neck, his lips nibbling at his sensitive skin.

Kyungsoo knows that he won’t last longer when Jongin starts fucking him into the mattress harder. His entire body trembles as his boyfriend fills him in, thrusts becoming erratic. Kyungsoo lets out a loud moan, his nails mark Jongin’s skin as the older one keeps thrusting in a faster pace. Jongin’s hand closes around Kyungsoo’s cock and he starts pumping in the same pace.

“Jo-Jongin... I’m gonna-...”

“Me too, baby.” Jongin whispers into his neck and it doesn’t take long before Kyungsoo’s eyes close tightly as his release paints their stomachs white.

Jongin pushes himself into Kyungsoo a little faster and then he stiffens above him after a few seconds. They both try to catch their breaths, chests heaving up and down against each other.

“I don’t know what got into you, but I like it.” Jongin says as he finally get off of Kyungsoo and slips out of him. He removes the condom and throws it into the trash bin next to the mattres. Yeah, they only brought stuff that are useful, so what?

“I'm tired.” Kyungsoo mumbles and breathes in deeply. He needs a moment to pull himself together. He turns to his side, his eyelids already feeling heavier.

He hears Jongin’s low chuckle and then feels something on his stomach and then his hole. Jongin cleans him gently and something tugs at Kyungsoo’s heart.

Jongin throws a blanket over him and then lays next to him, slowly pulling Kyungsoo into his arms. He plants a kiss on his hair. “Goodnight, Kyungsoo.”

“Goodnight, Jongin.”

Kyungsoo wraps an arms around Jongin’s naked torso and feels warmer than ever. He feels... _safe._ And he feels like there’s something he needs to get off of his chest.

“Jongin-... I need to tell you something.” He whispers.

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry for being stubborn and making you wait for so long while we could have spent so much more time together this summer-”

“We already talked about this.”

“No, not about this.” He can barely hear his own voice, he’s too sleepy but he needs to do this. “I know we’ve been together for a short time-” He yawns in this middle of his speech, his eyes burn. “I-” He tightens his hold around Jongin. “I think I’m falling in love with you.”

And then he surrenders himself to the safety of sleep.

Unaware of Jongin’s soft sigh.

Unaware of the tears welling on his eyes.

Unaware of Jongin who holds him tighter and plants another kiss over his head.

Not hearing Jongin’s low _I love you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos & comments are much appreciated (please leave comments I need to know what I'm doing wrong cause it seems to me that I AM doing something wrong :( )
> 
> you can find me @kaisooshot on twitter!  
> thank you for reading!!

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading it!! i hope it was worth your time TT
> 
> find me at @kayipkahraman on twitter&curiouscat


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